Fun USA Widget

Came across this on a friend's blog. Thought you might want to get one for yourself:


visited 12 states (24%)
Create your own visited map of The United States

Yep, I edited mine a little in Photoshop, to show where we currently live. I can do one for you, if you wish.

My Retraction

I feel so humbled today. Humbled not in a "I am a lowly worm" kind of way, but in a grateful, heart-overflowing-with-gratitude kind of way. I think it's obvious from the last few posts that I have been having a case of the blahs, and not really been up to my best. Kind of being crude, lackadaisical, sit-down-in-the-middle-of-the-road-because-I-just-don't-feel-like-walking-anymore kind of attitude. Having not so great thoughts, struggling a lot through some sludge, and wanting to get on top of it, and get back to being useful.

But I was standing in sacrament meeting today, singing in the choir between speakers. And as the song had just finished, and I was putting down my music, I looked over at our choir director, Sister Riddle, and I thought about how she had hesitantly asked us, in our brief practice before church, to change something in the last few measures of the song. She is always saying how inadequate she feels as a director. And standing there, I just had this moment of love for her as our performance was over, knowing that I was willing, without question, to do as she asked. I had submitted myself to her direction with love, and would do so gladly again, and always feel that way. I felt warmth from the Spirit break through the general mess in my head, and I felt so grateful that the Spirit would give something to me, anything, after the last few days. I just felt grateful for the rest of the meetings, grateful that even though I'm kind of a putz sometimes, that I have so many issues to overcome, but that Heavenly Father is still mindful of me, still willing to bless me, even with something so small.

I can keep going, keep allowing for the possibility of progression, still grateful instead of discouraged that the bar is higher, excited about a higher place to reach to instead of slown down by my own mediocrity. I seriously could use some improvement in some areas, and some things probably flat-out need an intervention, but despite my weaknesses and stubbornness, I know that I love Heavenly Father and the Savior, and just want to be useful to them, to love and serve their children, as they have given so much to us, to me personally. I find it hard to comprehend at times, in the billions, trillions, of people that have lived on just this planet, not even counting any others, how they could love me personally, and how to comprehend having a personal relationship with them in the eternities, but I just know I want to please them, to be fundamentally good, and to partake in the joy that I have been fortunate enough to experience at times here, and hope to partake of in even greater measure in the eternities.

End Post #73, 2009

Because The Man Upstairs Is Just Not That Stupid

Yep, I was maudlin at 2am last night. But it hasn't gone away quite yet. Just more thoughts on heaven/hell. For some reason, I found myself on Dug's blog this afternoon completely wasting time, and laughing myself to tears. And it occurred to me that when it's all said and done, I'll probably wind up in some level of heaven/hell with the people who appreciate fart jokes. I mean, after being a parent for nearly 15 years now, I just can't see The Man Upstairs giving me dominion over an endless number of children and worlds without end. Yes, we go to church every Sunday, we read our scriptures about 50% of the time, say prayers on the food, get our visting teaching/home teaching done (most of the time), kiss and hug the kids (sometimes more than they want, sometimes less), I am "friendly" to my husband way more often than I am naturally inclined, I send lots of loving thoughts out into the universe, am kind to animals, etc., but really, I boss those kids around at bedtime like their drill sergeant (Sue can play witness for that, gave her bad flashbacks to our childhood), I let the house go to crap a good part of the time, I have about a 5 minute attetion span when it comes to playing with my kids, I teach them fart jokes (but is that such a bad thing?), I backslap the teenagers' heads when they are being mouthy or just stupid, and the Bad-Mother-List goes on... and on... and on... And, besides the idea of that much repsonsibility in the eternities kind of makes my head hurt. All I ask is that He give me something useful and constructive to do, so that I can make a decent contribution. Please, that's all I want. Oh, and to be with people who appreciate potty humor. We'll be the ones cackling three levels down, and only slightly miserable most of the time.

Another thing I've concluded from my useless blog reading today, is that I need a better camera phone, for impromptu pics when I'm not lugging around the digital SLR. How many times have I wished for a camera, and not had one? But I almost always have a cell phone with me. Tiny cameras are good for sneaky/goofy little pics, like this one from Gil at Easter:

Random Babbling at 2am

Well, well, well, 1:30am, what do I write about?

Paid all my bills this morning, balanced the checkbook, exercised. Then wasted the rest of the day. Truth sucks, sometimes.

What do you think heaven is really like? Why is even the lowest kingdom better than earth life? Who will we really be hanging out with? Maybe hell is hanging out with people just like yourself. Maybe heaven is the same thing.

Judgement is really going to suck. How else could it be the slightest purifying, redemptive, if it wasn't painful? But maybe that's what we get for justice, if we give up on mercy and its pricetag.

Spring Snowstorm

Sometimes (I know you are snickering, "Sometimes? Hah!") the camera bug bites you on the rear end, and you get up and just have to take pictures. For some reason, the snow coming down thick, heavy, and fast, inspired me to go outside and take pictures today of a spring snowstorm:

View from the deck this morning.

Ditto.

I never measured it, but I bet it snowed over six inches today.

Connor insisted I take pictures of his handprints and footprints.


"See my snowball?" He really wanted to bring snowballs inside to throw around. Guess what I said.

One of our neighbors across the street. It's like the StayPuff Marshmallow man blew up outside. Notice how it has already melted off the sidewalks and street by the afternoon, and the clouds were already clearing away.

I love pine trees covered with snow.

Connor followed me outside, and on the way back in, he ran through a little snow shower from the wind blowing through the heavy snow on the trees.

I love the closeup as well as the big "take-it-all-in" view.

I love the contrast between the snow on the bare branches and the big, bright blue sky.

Today I had mushy brain. I just could not function or get up the motivation to do anything. I finally made myself exercise by 1:30 pm this afternoon, and I showered, thinking it would clear the cobwebs. Nope. Connor went to bed tonight in the same pair of jammies he slept in last night. I guess doing taxes took their toll, more than I had imagined. I hope tomorrow is better. I was almost completely useless today. And I have so much to do! I can't afford to be lazy. Aaargghhhhh!

You know that part in the movie, "Mr. Mom", where he feeds the baby a can of chili? I guess I had guy brain today, or something, because Emma had nachos for lunch, chili beans and all. Just teaching her to like Mexican food, gotta raise her up right, you know.

End Post #70, 2009

Tax Slave

Yes, I was the tax slave to the IRS yesterday and today. Ummm... that's pretty much it in a nutshell. That's why there was no post last night. At 1am, I made myself go to bed so I could function today, but I forgot to post something brief. This year, I used Turbo Tax online, very helpful I thought, and will probably use it again next year. I got myself a big fat refund, thank goodness, although it's going to get sucked up by medical bills, and the credit card payment. Extras for the time log - I did exercise both days, that's good. Can't think of anything else.

Check out a post of pics from this weekend with Sue. I'll do some more tomorrow. I may have even more pics from Saturday!

End Post #69, 2009

Cousins at the Playground

All the cousins had a good day at the playground on Friday, April 10th. All the bases got covered: playing in the sand, sliding, swinging, climbing, and just having fun. Here's the proof:


I know Dani's kind of in a chunky phase, but even so, there are times I look at her, and I see how beautiful she is going to be when she grows up. Heck, I think she's pretty cute now.

Monkey bars!

Connor never misses a chance to roll down a hill.

I'd skipped out in the beginning to pick up some beads at Wal-Mart, so I came in at the Second Half. Dani and Lily were getting worn out.

Mackay slept through a lot of it, amazingly enough.

Sue, snuggling Mackay, and playing with her girls.



There's no doubt, Amelia got the cuteness award at the playground that day.

Connor saw Amelia trying to climb, and he showed what a big monkey he could be. At the top - standard goofy smile and all.

Dani and Lily (mostly Lily, who was shorter and had longer to fall), showed how brave they could be jumping down from the top of the platform.

Connor kept racing to the top of the slide, practically shoving poor Amelia out of the way. "Mom, watch me!"


And, let's end with a goofy pic. Insert your own caption.

End Post #68, 2009