Randomly Odd Bits - Becky's Blah Blah Blahg

Goofballs

2010-10-17T23:01:00.000-06:00

Okay, forget backtracking on stuff that needs to be blogged. Let's move on from here, because if I don't, I will probably NEVER blog again. And that would be sad. Here's today's offering, random goofy pics I took tonight:

Gil stuck his Disco costume "fro" wig on Sammy.

Emma's super cheesy face.

Connor's cultured offering.

Where Has the Time Gone?!

2010-09-05T23:06:00.000-06:00

Man, what do I even write about? I've been so focused on my weight-loss blog this summer, that the family blog got really neglected. I barely got the Bear Lake Reunion posted, and here's a list of things I should have posted about, but didn't get to:

1. Zen's Allred Family Reunion, same weekend as the Bear Lake Reunion. Zen and the teenagers went on a 4-wheeler day-trip up in the mountains with the Allred clan.

2. Susie's visits, & fun times at the pool

3. Lots of cute Sammy, Emma, & Connor pics, and Dani and Gil being cute with the little ones

4. Still want to post the cards from Mother's Day and Father's Day

5. A trip to Cokeville to see Lily in the Junior Rodeo. It was really fun!

6. Connor's birthday, Dani's birthday

Maybe I could tackle one each day this week, but who am I kidding? At least two big posts are happening on Tuesday - Gil and Dani are going back to school in Gil's first car! And Connor starts kindergarden that day, too!

Ughh - could I freeze time for about a week, so I could catch up? Just when I sit down to do something and get into a groove, I have to do something for somebody. Will I get some more time when 3 out of 5 are in school? We'll see... And hello, could I get my Medical Transcription done?!! We are constantly on the razor's edge of "what should we pay with this paycheck, and what can we put off?", so many extra bills have piled up, mostly medical and dental, that it's a trick just putting food on the table right now. It just makes me want to cry. Zen is job-hunting on the side for something new, and we are praying constantly for a better job, something extra to happen so we will not be scrambling for money all the time. I need to get my brain in gear, so I can focus on the Medical Transcription, and get that done PRONTO. That probably means giving up some of my focus on my weight loss, but that's another saga. I know there are plenty of people in much worse circumstances than we are in (Sue and her family have been through the ringer this spring and summer, and are just coming out of it,) not just in this country but around the world, and I count my blessings, but I still keep hoping and praying for some relief.

Bear Lake Reunion 2010

2010-08-29T22:03:00.000-06:00

Hold on to your britches. There are 32 pics here. Maybe that's why I haven't blogged very well here on my family blog lately. I knew I had this big post to deal with. And yet, it still feels like only a tiny portion of this year's reunion story will get told. It was hard this year, dealing with two reunions on the same weekend. It meant missing some or all of our Cox Family Reunion. We compromised this year, going to Zen's family reunion on Friday, and our family's reunion on Saturday.

Not everyone is picture perfect, but this was the best overall shot of all of us on the beach at Bear Lake. I'm glad there were so many of us here! But I hope we get to spend more time together next year. I'm really excited that David and his family are planning on coming next summer. Wahoo!

It was all about the sand this year on the beach.

Sassy frass!
Two days before, Gil took Connor for a ride on the motorcycle on Zen's parents' farm. Of course, he wrecked it, and fortunately it was pretty minor, but I was constantly irritated with Gil and Zen every time I watched Connor hobble around on his injured foot. I'm not sure he's completely healed yet, but I don't know if it's due to an actual chronic injury, or he just got used to limping.

Again, no hot chicks allowed on the beach!

Don't you just want to squeeze his chunky thighs?!

Josh can always be counted on to get out some serious gear to help the kids with their sand castles.

I think Lily managed to get sand everywhere, and I mean EVERYWHERE.

Dani had a blast in the water all day, and a sunburn to prove it!

My coolio man, who also managed to lose his keys in the water. Oops!

Woohoo! Watch out!

This was pretty much Emma's opinion of deep water for most of the day, "Lemmee out! Lemmee out!"

Gil, goofin' off in the kids' tube.

The Montmeny's brought their turtle, whose name I think was Checkers, and he was very interesting to all the little boys, and some of the girls, too.

This was as close as Emma wanted to get to the water for most of the day.

Our headquarters on the beach, with the state flags from Utah, Colorado, and Wyoming represented. Maybe we can get a flag for David next year!!

Sand makes a lovely condiment.

Liz was definitely the Quilting Queen with her show-and-tell this year, a fabulous nursing quilt!

She was also working on a great quilt inspired by the children's book Barnyard Dance! by Sandra Boynton, a favorite at our house.

Pajammy to the left, pajammy to the right... oh, that's another book.

Mom organized a great lunch. This was probably the point where I threw in the towel on counting my calories. Mom also had wonderful jars of apricot jam to give away from the tree she planted eight years ago in honor of Hope. What luscious jam! We've gone through two jars already, and the third jar isn't going to last much longer, with the many grilled PB&J sandwiches the kids have fallen in love with this summer.

This was probably the last year of the quilt giveaway. All enthusiasm for handmaking quilts has died out. What should we do for next year? Maybe we should just have a big show-and-tell. Actually, I think that could be pretty fun! If you're not crafty, then make up a posterboard or some little presentation of activities that portray your own special kind of talents.

Connor had a blast out in the water, too, and had a matching sunburn just like Dani's. In fact, his sunburn made such an impression on him, that for weeks afterwards, he kept talking about how the sun was out to get everyone.

No, it's not a snowball, it's a sandball.

Tickle toes, tickle toes!

Sleepy Bennett. I think all the kids were feeling like this by the end of the day.

Zen and Dani finally coaxed Emma out into the water.

Dani is so awesome with little kids. I get compliments about her all the time at church, as people watch her with Connor, Emma, and Sam in sacrament meeting.

Miraculously, we had enough energy left after we got home, to clean out the van. Zen even vacuumed it out for me. Fifty gold stars for you!

Dani and Gil were less than enthused about cleaning up.

A little sidenote - Zen had to point out the evidence of my "lead foot." See, over the past ten years I've worn a hole through the car mat, and even through the carpet.

Dream Home Toy Room? Maybe Not

2010-08-28T07:53:00.001-06:00

You know, in my dream home there is a BIG toy room, where all the kids' toys will live and the kids can go in there and mess it up to their hearts' content. But would that work, really?

After wallking through a pigsty for three or four days, I put my foot down and the kids and I cleaned the upstairs. Connor and Sam's room, also known as the toy room, often gets neglected, but I was tired of carefully stepping through the mess like it was a minefield. So, we put all the toys away in the right places and vacuumed the cracker crumbs off the carpet. See how clean and lovely it is? But did Connor want to set up his trains in there?

No, he hauled everything out to the hallway and main living area, where all the action is.

I think in my dream home, the toy room will have to merge with the tv room in one big living area, or I'm still going to find toys all over the house! Dang kids!

Four Months Old

2010-08-08T23:59:00.004-06:00

Sweet baby Sammy, four months old yesterday. I kiss your little toes! Stay little just a little longer!

Happy Birthday Sookie Sue

2010-08-08T23:58:00.000-06:00

Gorgeous, darling, gorgeous!

Raisin' 'Em Up Right

2010-08-08T23:57:00.000-06:00

Gil is contributing to Sammy's training.

I Pity His Kindergarden Teacher

2010-08-07T10:21:00.000-06:00

The locker room, Connor's second day of swim lessons.

Connor started swim lessons this week. His first day was a disaster. He completely freaked out when his teacher insisted he put on goggles and put his face in the water to blow bubbles, and when she tried to carry him around the pool he started fighting with her, pinching and hitting her. When I picked him up (I wasn't there because they tell the parents to go away because they are a distraction), he was bawling his eyes out, and after I talked to his swim teachers, leading him away to the locker rooms, he was still so upset that he threw up on the tile. Thank goodness not in the pool. But good grief! That boy has a brick head, a will of iron. If he makes up his mind that he doesn't want to do something, it's very difficult to derail his train of thought.

I immediately formed a strategy, telling his teacher, who is a no-nonsense kind of gal, that I would bring Connor back to the pool later and work with him to get him ready for class the next day. So, that's what we did. I brought him back that afternoon, and we took things slow and easy, fitting a pair of goggles to his face and he sat on the steps while blowing bubbles in the water. He was resistant every step of the way, "No, I don't want to do that!" but I told him that there was no way he was getting to swim in the new awesome pool if he didn't go to swim lessons. Plus, I threatened to take away his Wii privileges. That almost always produces results.

Connor also got a lot of guff from his Dad, Gil, and Dani. "You hit your teacher?! That is sooo bad!" And everyone gave him a hard time to the point that he was rolling his eyes and holding up his hand, "Okay, I don't want to talk about it anymore!"

The next day went a lot better, almost a total 180, and he did what his teachers told him to do, for the most part. He's still a little resistant, but at least he's not freaking out and hitting people. The no-nonsense gal has taken up the lifeguard position on the sidelines, leaving Connor with the soft-talking-sooth-the-children swim teacher. Frankly, he needs someone to be firm with him, because he's so bull-headed, he's going to run right over a meek personality.

I'm kind of dreading kindergarden because we've had some interesting incidents with him in primary. Once, he was sitting out in the hall pouting because he didn't want to be in sharing time, and he watched until all five adults in the hallway weren't looking, and he snuck off from church and just walked home. We looked all over the church, under tables, in cabinets, and finally we figured out what happened to him. He was just sitting at home, watching tv. Just a few weeks ago, they were discussing birthdays in class, and he got so upset that it wasn't it his birthday yet, that he wound up hiding under the sinks in the bathroom. I had to go in and lay down the law before he'd go back to class. His poor teacher is the soft-spoken kind, and tries to talk him out of his stubbornness, but it hardly ever works. He needs a demonstration of consequences before he will change his train of thought. Sweet-talking and logic don't make a dent. He has to be diverted by an entirely new train of thought or be forced to turn.

His poor kindergarden teacher. I feel a lot of parent-teacher conferences coming my way. Frankly, a part of me is preparing to home school that kid. I don't know yet how bad it's going to be in the more-structured atmosphere of public school.

Pray For Us

2010-08-03T22:10:00.003-06:00

1st drive by himself, legally.

His Dad got Gil his own set of keys, after he passed his driver's test yesterday and got his official license. Did Zen have to do that?

Yep, my insurance just went up $112 a month, A MONTH. That's a 130% increase. And that's if he doesn't do anything stupid.

Hiking Out to the Petroglyphs

2010-07-22T23:59:00.000-06:00

About 20 miles outside of Rock Springs, out by Boar's Tusk and the sand dunes, are some rock formations that have many figures carved into the surface. Here is what the Wyoming Tourism site had to say:
"Hundreds of carved figures dot the sandstone cliffs at the White Mountain Petroglyph site in Wyoming’s Red Desert. As one of Wyoming’s premier rock art sites, the White Mountain Petroglyphs should be a stop on any tour of southwestern Wyoming. Etched into the stone surface some 200 to 1,000 years ago, several figures appear to portray bison and elk hunts while others depict geometric forms or tiny footprints. Handprints are worn into the rock as well, providing visitors with a compelling connection to those who used the site long ago."

We went down a dirt road for about 20 to 30 minutes, then parked at a little rest area. A fifteen minute hike later brought us to the base of the cliffs.

Walk it off, sister!

It was terribly windy today, more at the beginning than the end, but I was thankful all the kids made it.

The sandstone cliffs.

A baby inside the mama, perhaps buffalo.

Sammy took it pretty well. His first hike, and in Wyoming wind!

Licking the backpack was his main occupation. I wonder how many grandchildren have been hauled around in this thing?

Can you see it? Think reindeer.

Emma was so independent today. Every time we tried to help her climb over a rough spot, she would scream at us to leave her alone. Sheesh, two-year-olds.

I think this one is my favorite, the warrior astride his mount, wearing a headdress, and raising his spear.

Connor was fascinated by this small cave. He hemmed and hawed, pestering everyone to go in the cave before he would, because he thought it was scary.

I love the beauty of rock formations. So many interesting shapes, and wonderful warm stone colors.

Our one family picture of the day. There were a few other hikers out there, two older men, and a teenage boy about Gil's age, maybe older. One of them graciously took our picture, but of course, Connor and Emma were not cooperative. Gil is at High Adventure Camp this week, acquiring some blisters by going on long hikes.

Connor finally convinced us to go in the cave ahead of him, so I crawled in to show him it was safe, he climbed in after me, and then he didn't want to leave. What boy doesn't love a secret hideout?

On the way back, riding in the truck, Dani shared her MP3 earbuds with Emma, who was fascinated by the music coming out of them. "Look, she's just like me, " Dani said, "everyone should have a Mini Me." Oh, boy, those should be some fun years ahead.

We topped off our little trip with some yummy Chicken Bacon Artichoke pizza from Papa Murphy's. It's surprisingly light on the waistline, for a pizza anyway.

Awww, come on, how much trouble could I really get in? Besides, therapy's not THAT expensive, right?

2010-07-21T23:18:00.003-06:00

Connor - for sassing his mother all the time and generally making everything a battle, refusing to eat healthy food, playing too much Wii (don't talk to me about how much that is my fault), taking Emma's toys, and repeatedly blowing in Sammy's face, even when I tell him not to. Sheesh, boys.

Emma - for trashing my house all the time. Sheesh, two-year-olds.

You Might Be A Redneck

2010-07-19T23:51:00.001-06:00

...if you build a toy for your baby from PVC pipe.

Sammy liked it, so don't mock.

Birthday Addendum

2010-07-18T23:52:00.000-06:00

Oops!! My bad!! I forgot to show the great gifts the Grammie sent to Gil and Emma:

Nothing beats birthday cake for breakfast the next day!

Emma always loves the singing cards. It sets her little dancer toes to tappin'! This one had Gloria Estefan's "Conga." Shake that thing!

A dollar for each year. Great thing for the 16-year-old! Could I get that on my 40th? Just kidding!

Gil's Sweet 16 and Emma's Terrible-2 Birthday

2010-07-18T09:25:00.002-06:00

Zen was out in the field for Emma's birthday on June 17th, so we held off the family party until he was back in town. Gil's b-day was July 5th, so we had both Emma's and Gil's party on the Fourth of July.

Yummm, sneaking an icing lick is half the fun!

Ha, ha!!!

I made a strawberry-banana cake with Cool Whip frosting for Emma, and a blueberry cheesecake for Gil. Scary calories, but oh so tasty.

We all saw Toy Story 3 with Sue and her kids just a few days before this. I knew it would be a big hit, so I stocked up on the Toy Story figures a few months before the movie came out, thinking that the most popular figures would be sold out by the time her birthday rolled around.

Emma LOVED the toys...

...and so did Connor. He'd been begging for a Buzz Lightyear for months, and it was excruciating for him to see his sister get one before him. So I went out the next morning and bought another Buzz, without the popout wings. That one is "Emma's Buzz" and winged Buzz is "Connor's Buzz." Normally, I only buy the kids toys on birthdays and Christmas, but I made an exception this time.

Aahhhh, cheesecake pleasure! Blueberry cheesecake is Gil's favorite, and this is the fourth birthday in a row I've made one for him.

What does a 16-year-old want for his birthday? A car, of course. And as a matter of fact, that might happen. Zen has gone out to Dickinson, North Dakota, so many times, that he a a few coworkers were wishing they had a car to drive around while they were in town. One of them found this old car, in okay condition, for $500, and they all pitched in and bought it. Cheaper than a car rental, that's for sure. Anyway, the deal is that Zen gets to drive it home and keep it when the Dickinson rotations come to an end, supposedly in a few months. It's not a sure thing, but it's a probability, and Gil is excited about that. In the meantime, he'll have to content himself with the preorder of the Starcraft II computer game we bought for him, and which comes out on July 27th. He's counting down the days.

What the --?!!!! I'm Glad I'm Not Nursing!

2010-07-16T22:47:00.002-06:00

"See me? Mmm... fingers are yummy!"

"Can I get my whole fist in my mouth?"

"My thumb is the best part!" But, he sure has been diggin' his binky lately. I wonder why?

Wait for it...

"See my tooth? I'm such a big boy!!!!" This afternoon Dani yelled down the stairs at me, "Mom, you've got to come see this! Sammy has a tooth!!!" I'm sitting downstairs, concentrating on making some cards to go with my apology chocolate zucchini bread for the sisters I visit teach and my VT partner (forgot our appointments last night, yes, I'm a dork). Anyway, I heard that, and I kind of mentally rolled my eyes. "Man, she's delusional. It's waaaaay too early for teeth," I thought. Several hours later, I got around to checking in Sammy's mouth, and sure enough! He has his first tooth. Go figure! "I'm a big kid now!" Makes me glad I'm not nursing.

Things I Would Do If I Had All The Time In The World

2010-07-14T23:28:00.003-06:00

I was going to do this huge post today, but it's after eleven, and I told myself I would quit staying up until midnight blogging. It's all part of my goal to maximize my time, be efficient, and get more stuff done. So, here's a fun, quick post. Things I would do if I had all the time (and resources) in the world:

FANTASY TO-DO LIST

1. Clean up my craft room, and build the ultimate storage system by making custom, interchangable storage units, like those I found on my fantasy website, ScrapNcube. I'd get to use all those woodworking skills I learned in high school and college.
2. Organize all the remaining papers and craft supplies, and put them into fun packages and to-do kits to resell.
3. Scan all my negatives, and make a master digital file of all the pictures I have ever taken, complete with notes and photo identification.
4. Frankly, I vacillate between the desire to be a productive person, and just wanting to vegetate my brain out. I'm in productive mode these days, but a part of me fantasizes about days I could structure according to what mood strikes me. But, I have played havoc with our finances too many times with credit cards, and my time is not my own, so I must study, study, study that Medical Transcription course and get it done, so we can have some financial stability.
5. Things I wish I had time (and money) to learn, so I could do them myself and be of useful service to other people - auto mechanics, computer technology, financial stock market, home construction, languages.
6. Unstructured, undemanding days where I could take me and the kids where the wind blows us. Just turn my brain off, and do what they wanted to do.
7. Service, service, service. Believe it or not, I often think of ways I could connect with other people, and hours of time I wish I had to help them. But, I'm the mom of five kids at home, and the time I can give to other people is limited.
8. Travel. This one I'm saving up for when the kids are older. Traveling with small children is a huge pain in the rear, in my opinion, and takes the fun out of the whole thing by worrying about their safety all the time.
9. Yard work and gardening - man, I just don't have time for this, but I love digging in the dirt. It's therapeutic and satisfying.
10. Books, books, books. Have I ever mentioned that I love reading? That's the understatement of the century. There is definitely not enough time for this. In fact, I have to stay away from books sometimes, because they are a huge temptation and can be a huge time-waster if I start one I find interesting.
11. Craft projects - too many to mention. I have an addiction for crafts, no doubt. But, specifically, I would make more cards, give out more cards, and also get into quilting. Sue and I were just having this conversation, because she is working on a quilt for the family reunion. Quilts are just beautiful, and I wish I had more time, and a lot of dough, to make some.

That's what I could come up with for now. Comment about your own wish list.

Houston, We Have A Problem

2010-07-13T23:49:00.001-06:00

2 Jul
3 Jul
Sam definitely loves to suck on his fingers. One the one hand, it's completely adorable. On the other hand, you can't take away their thumb when they're older, and thumb-sucking isn't cute anymore.

Since taking these pics a little over a week ago, I have definitely made a concerted effort to get him addicted to, umm, I mean used to, a binky. I think it's working, because even though he mostly spits it out when he's awake, he definitely goes to town on it when he's tired and I lay him down for a nap.

Everyone Should Have A Suzi

2010-07-12T23:59:00.001-06:00

It's very confusing sometimes, but Dani's BFF is also called Suzi. They are both in our ward together, and both will be in eigth grade together in the fall. They text each other all the time, and are spending lots of time together this summer.

Today, Dani was talking about the Rock Springs fair coming up in August, and she said something along the lines of, "Yeah, Gil hangs out with all his friends (last year they both went to the fair, and he ditched Dani to hang with his friends), but this year I will have Suzi." Yep, I totally dig your message. Everyone should have a "Suzi." I know I do.

Sam's Beautiful Blessing Day

2010-07-11T23:29:00.001-06:00

June 6 was a beautiful day for a blessing, and we were thankful for everyone who was able to come, including Zen's parents, Zen's sister Mickie and her family, my Mom, Sue and her kids.

Zen gave a beautiful blessing, so articulate and special. It was a wonderful last-baby-blessing to cap our family with. I wish I could post it here, but it's too public. I really want to round up all my kids' blessings and get them in a binder sometime. It's amazing that even though most of the same things generally get said in a baby blessing, it can still feel special and unique.

Wow, here we are, all together!! Seven of us, hard to imagine. Zen and I both come from a family with four children. Sam broke the pattern, but that's a good thing. Zen suggested once that Sam kind of might be an "extra" spirit, but I basically told him to bite his tongue. Our Sammy is most welcome in our family.

Zen's parents and us. Sam is likely the last grandchild. Next come great-grandchildren.

A wonderful three-generation photo. I'm so glad Mom and Sue could be there.

My Mom was assigned the job of picking out Sam's blessing outfit. She did a wonderful job! It has a beautiful, crocheted look to it. I loved it!

Sue's pics had some beautiful compositions, but Sam was just a scowler. Doesn't he know yet how to cooperate with the paparazzi?

Hmmm... Mommy kisses remind me I'm hungry.

Sam, you are not allowed to outgrow Mommy kisses, yet.

The FunMaster

2010-07-10T23:59:00.000-06:00

More hugs and loves out to Zen, who is so far away in Dickinson, North Dakota, for the next two weeks. I can't say enough about how much we appreciate him, and how I know what a sacrifice it is to be away from us for such long periods of time. I do my best to hold down the fort, so that when Zen gets home, he feels that his sacrifice is worth it. I know it is. Love you, sweetie!

When Sue was here a week and a half ago, we went swimming over at Dan's hotel pool then, too. It was an overcast day, and when it started thundering, we all scurried out of the pool. Zen was home the last half of that week, and we were sure glad to have him with us. He is The FunMaster, a lot more ready and willing than I am, usually, to get out of the house and go do fun things together.

This year, as in every year, Zen was in charge of buying fireworks for the Fourth of July. We started off our celebrations on Saturday, the 3rd, because the kids were chomping at the bit to blow things up. "Awww, come on, let's at least do sparklers!" So we went out back on our deck, and lit up the night.

The next night, we drove a little out of town down Foothill Blvd, and just parked the van on the side of the road to watch the fireworks being shot off at the fairgrounds.

It was so cold and windy that night. Zen, Dani, and Emma toughed in out in the camp chairs on the sidewalk.

Gil, Sammy and I stayed in the van. Zen had me tune the radio to the station where they were playing the accompanying music to the light show. I only wish the weather was better, but maybe next year. That's Wyoming for you.

Just when I was getting the hang of my telephoto lense and my camera settings, my battery died, so I only got a few shots, but it really was a beautiful light show.

Summer Fun With The Cousins

2010-07-09T19:10:00.001-06:00

I'm so glad Sue and I are getting a chance to spend some time together this summer. I'm always wishing we lived closer, because a two-hour car trip is just a bit much to be doing constantly throughout any week, but hey, how cool is it that we both live in Wyoming! Whoever would have guessed?! I thought I'd do my blogging earlier in the day this time, instead of staying up until midnight. Then, I can get my exercising done before all the kids wake up. But I digress. Sue was here briefly yesterday and today with her kids, all visiting Dan, who is doing some training for Halliburton here in Rock Springs, before he ships off to Texas for three months. We all went swimming over at the hotel pool today. What a blast! It was the perfect day, and the only downer was that even though the sun was bright and the air was hot, the water was coooooold from the past few days of overcast weather! Brrrr!

I'm making this my "official" before weight-loss picture. What is that word Sue uses for hot guys and gals? Sookie!!

Speaking of Sookie... you go size-8-girl!!

Despite the bazillion kid-friendly pool floaties I bought, Emma would NOT go further into the pool than the first few steps.

Cutie little Mac, in his lifevest floatie.

Connor had a blast, despite the cold water. And Dani is great with all the little kids, and big kids too, playing games like "shark" with Lily, making her squeal in delight.

Amelia had a lot of cute pics, but this was my favorite. Sue took all these pics today. Can't you tell?! Go professional photographer!

This was supposed to be Sammy's pool floatie, but Emma staked her claim first, even though she wouldn't take it in the water.

Sammy loves his baths, but today was his first time in a swimming pool. He was not impressed by the frigid water. "You guys are crazy, what are you doing to me?!!"

But after a while, with some cuddling from Momma and some gradual dunking, he was willing to put his legs in the water.

If Lily could have done it, I think she would have stacked a tower of floaties together to swim with.

Between brave dips in the pool, the kids huddled up on the lounge chairs in the warm sun.

You'd think Mack was done with a chair he'd gotten his foot stuck in and had to be rescued by his Momma. But Emma and Mack are at that wonderful terrible-two stage where they are really territorial and bossy about anything they think is "their" stuff. So, Mack was complaining that Emma was taking the cranky chair he'd just gotten out of. It was kind of funny.

Mack sure loves his big sisters.

I'm so glad they all got to visit, and I'll still keep having fantasies that Sue and I live in the same town, or at least less than an hour apart.

Big Daddy Zen

2010-07-08T23:59:00.000-06:00

Ran out of time to do a bigger post, but here's a nod to Zen, who is able to check my blog when he is out on rotation in North Dakota for a few weeks. This one's for you, sweetie!! Love you!!

3 July - Zen worked his magic on Sammy while he was home last week. Daddies, babies, and couches just go together, like bacon and eggs.

3 Months Old

2010-07-06T23:52:00.004-06:00

~~Connor~~ SAM is three months old today. My how time flies! I tried to get a pic of him smiling, but the most I could catch was a slightly amused expression.

He and I have a good groove. I've figured out his preferences, and I know how to help him when he's fussy. He sleeps through the night, can hold his head up, drinks his bottle like a champ, likes to put weight on his legs if you hold him, and loves to be talked to and played with, but as busy as I am, he spends most of his waking hours in his little reclining chair watching all the chaos in our house (i.e. the other kids). He may take longer to roll and move than the other kids, just because his mother can't get to him as often as she should.

And hey, Sue is back!!! It was good to read a post from her! I'm going to take a page out of her book, and write a summary of the things that have happened, and that I'd like to blog about, if I ever get the time:

Mother's Day - Zen was out in the field, but the kids made me breakfast in bed early in the morning. I was a crankyhead at the time (it was soon after Sam was born, and I was still getting terrible sleep), but I sucked it up and ate what they brought me.
Father's Day - again, Zen was out in the field, but we mailed him a care package of goodies and funny Father's Day cards. I'll see if I can scan and post them.
Sam's Blessing Day - Zen gave a wonderfully articulate and thought-out blessing. If it wasn't such a sacred thing, I'd post the entire text of it on my blog. Is it okay to put quotes of it in? I'm not sure of the etiquette of that. Somebody clue me in.
Emma turned 2 and Gil turned a magical 16. Holy Monkeys! He'll be driving on his own soon! Just a few details to finish up for his license.
Sue came to visit last week for Gil and Dani's summer play, and to see Dan, who is doing some training here in Rock Springs. We swam in his hotel pool, and we all went to see Toy Story 3.
The cleaning and organizing I have been doing in the past two weeks, trying to make room in Emma and Connor's room for Sam. He's still sleeping in the swing bassinet in our room. I don't mind his company, but his little legs are a little cramped in there.
All the little things about each of the kids: Gil, Dani, Connor, Emma, and Sam.

I hardly have the time to keep up with this blog, because I've been putting so much effort into my health blog, that at the end of the day, I just don't have the time for this one. Plus, I'm really behind on my Medical Transcription, and I need to catch up. There are just not enough hours in the day!

How Big Am I?

2010-06-29T23:20:00.002-06:00

I took Sammy and Emma in for their shots today. Emma took it like a champ, and Sammy cried his poor little heart out. Emma turned two this month (we're putting the party on hold for Zen, who is out in the field), and Sam turned two months. Emma weighed 28 pounds, and is 35 inches tall, about 80th percentile. Sammy is 25-1/2" tall, about 95 percentile for his age, and weighs 14 lb. 7 oz. Go Sammy!

Froggy!

I am a little blob of playdough.

But sometimes I smile!

I took Connor and Emma to Arthur Park tonight. Emma, as usual, kept running off to join the circus (because she's a monkey), making me chase her and bring her back to the playground. I got exercise points for that, don't you know.

Smile For Me!

2010-06-27T23:31:00.000-06:00

I'm trying to savor every second of Sam's baby stage. After all, he's my last, and there probably won't be a grandbaby for another 8 to 10 years (at least, there better not be!) I love how he smells, such a sweet, baby skin smell. When he gets bigger and runs everywhere and eats real food, he won't smell so nice anymore. So I'm constantly burying my face in his neck and breathing him in.

Sammy smiled in his sleep, almost from the beginning, but that's just kind of a facial twitch when he's really relaxed in his sleep. The real interactive smiling has come more gradually. First it was just opening his mouth, like he was really excited that someone was talking to him:

11 June

And sometimes, he would slip in a half-smile:

But then, last night when I was out shopping, Gil and Dani figured out how to make him smile really big by bouncing him on their knee:

He and I also carry on conversations now. Of course it's just the goofy, silly talk that moms do, and Sammy just coos and gurgles, but it's fun to see him start developing a personality and interact with people. The super-fun stage is just around the corner, when he laughs and giggles. Can't wait!

Orthodontic Woes

2010-06-24T23:59:00.004-06:00

Yep, I got my first kid in braces yesterday, and none too soon. He graduates from high school in two years. Yikes! I post-poned it for as long as I could, financially, but now it's time to bite the bullet, because we are running out of time. It will cost us about $200 a month for 18 months, and that's after insurance pitches in. Sigh.

Gil's comment was, "I look like a freak!" and then, "I had no idea what I was getting into!" The price of beauty, sweetheart.

I had Dani evaluated as well, and while I wanted to get her started, we just can't afford it right now. She was massively disappointed. I wish I could do something about it, but it's just not possible. Crud.

I was evaluated, too. Here's the chain of events behind that - I have six baby teeth spots in my mouth, no adult teeth ever grew in. Thank you, bad genetics. Three of them have already been pulled, and there are bridges. Of the three remaining in my mouth, one of them is really disintegrating, and needs to be pulled out. It's kind of stable right now, but that won't be the case forever. That means one of two things - grinding down the surrounding teeth (not the best thing) and putting in a bridge, or getting an implant. Now, an implant is super-permanent. When they put it in, the bone grows around the base of the implant root. But my teeth have drifted since I had braces when I was 12, and they are really out of alignment. Big conclusion - I will have to wear braces to align my teeth ($5500), then get at least four implants (for the decayed one, and for the current bridges which will be removed when they put on the braces), which can be about $2000 a pop. So, I'm looking at anywhere from $12,000 to $15,000 of dental work depending on what options I want to take. My current insurance does not cover adult orthodontics, but may cover some of the implants. The whole process could take anywhere from 2 to 3 years. But I can't do any of that until I've got Dani and Gil through braces. Man, I will be in my early 40's wearing braces! And paying out a million dollars, too. Poop.

One Month - My How Time Flies

2010-05-06T23:59:00.001-06:00

Day One

One month old today. I had Sam weighed at the doctor's office yesterday, and he was 10 lb. 3 oz. Good boy! He's filling out, don't you think?

Sam and his sisters.

Dani got her first pair of glasses yesterday. Tres chic!

My bright-eyed girl. I love it when she says, "Okay, Momma." Everyone else calls me "Mom," but she calls me "Momma" with her little girl voice, a sweet sound, indeed.

Overwhelmed

2010-04-26T23:59:00.002-06:00

Emma is the poster child for neglect these days. The two teenagers pretty much get what they need because they are pretty self-sufficient to begin with, and have the emotional/social skills to tell me what they need. Connor is almost in the same category, he's just a little more high-maintenance because of his age. But still, he's doing okay because he can tell me what he wants. Sam gets what he wants, because his needs are so simple and being the newborn, he gets a lot of attention. Emma is getting the short stick, because she's two and very busy, but can't verbalize her thoughts and feelings very well. She's lost the cute baby position of indulgence, and has entered the "we expect more out of you because you know better" phase of her life, which really isn't going to go away. These pics tell a little story:

Apr 20th - Emma was so cute, hauling her stuff around in her backpack.

But this picture tells a bit more of the story - getting tired in the chaos of our house, she just curled up on the kitchen table and went to sleep.

Poor baby, one of her main entertainments is to play with the buttons on the dvd player and tv on our kitchen table and watch movies.

Just yesterday, I stayed home from church with Emma, because she had a cold with a green snotty nose that made her ineligible for nursery. Plus, I was feeling exhausted and antisocial, so it didn't take much to keep me home from church. Anyway, although I thought we could enjoy a few good moments to ourselves while everyone else was gone and Sammy was asleep, Emma and I had a sad moment when I was changing her diaper. She was kicking me and wouldn't stop, so I gave her a swat on her butt. Usually, she would cry and want to be comforted, but after a mini-lecture from me, she just took her weepy self to her crib, crawled in, and went to sleep. It just broke my heart, I felt so sad that she's developing this necessary independence because her Mommy just can't get to her very often. She gets attention from other people in the house, but I just feel too distant from her most of the time.

Which leads me to the topic of how I'm doing. I always meant to blog about the two sessions I've had with a therapist, but time got away from me right before Sam was born, and ever since then there's been too many other things to think about. But that's deeper and more time consuming than I want to go into right now. Basically, right now I'm in that place that every woman is in with a newborn - trying to juggle responsibilities, yet also dealing with sleep deprivation. It's completely textbook, but knowing that doesn't make it any easier to deal with. While I've solved the problem of feeding Sam, now we're into the phase where he's learning how to sleep. The first few weeks seemed to come easy: if you fed him, changed his diaper, cuddled him for a while, he would go to sleep. But now he really fights it all the time. It's an ordeal getting him to sleep, and he won't stay asleep for more than a few hours at a time. It's tough love time, where he has to be taught how to fall asleep on his own, so he can sleep for longer periods of time. It can take 10 to 12 hours to accumulate six to eight hours of sleep for me, so the time I have to do anything productive is really cut down. I'm still mentally slow, but I can tell that it's not hormone dependent anymore, I just need some consistent sleep. Plus, I'm back to studying my medical transcription course material. The extra tax return money is almost gone, and I have no choice but to push myself every day to get done so I can start earning some money. Good grief, we've got five kids now. All of a sudden, it just feels so overwhelming. The house is dirty all the time, I'm tired, I'm stressed about money, I feel like a mediocre mother, and though I love my family, sometimes I wish I could escape into a little rift in time so I could hide out by myself for a week with only me and Sammy to take care of. With everyone in the house, it's just input/output overload. I really miss those two days in the hospital. Sort of makes a girl wish she could run away to a spa for a month after the birth of a baby. But duty calls, and the moths flying out of my pocketbook nix that concept.

Two Weeks Old

2010-04-25T22:37:00.000-06:00

On the 19th, I took Sam in for his two-week well-baby checkup. Remember, he weighed 8lb. 4.9 oz. at birth, 7 lb. 12 oz. leaving the hospital, 7 lb. 15 oz. 6 days after birth. But on the 19th, he weighed 8lb. 13 oz. One pound in a week. Go Sammy! It's a relief knowing he's doing well. And I'm over the drama of nursing. Knowing I can feed him as much as he needs, and that he's healthy, is a good feeling.

My five children. This was as good at it got on Apr 20th. I got three pics, and then everyone scattered.

Apr 20 - two weeks old. Swallowed by the pants, but he'll grow into them.

Bring on the Dirt

2010-04-25T22:25:00.000-06:00

Apr 15 - Spring has been approaching for several weeks. For several weeks after the flurry of snow on the day Sam was born, we had spring weather and Emma and Connor ventured out into the back yard to dig around in the dirt.

Emma loves to eat dirt and rocks. Every time she comes in from playing in the dirt patch that is our back yard, her mouth is covered in dirt. Though, I think she just savors the rocks and spits them out when she's done.

Two compatriots in our dirt patch. I've been saying for several summers that we need to put grass in our back yard. Think it will happen this year?

First Dunk in the Tub

2010-04-25T22:10:00.000-06:00

On Thursday, Apr 15, Sam's cord fell off, so we gave him his first dunk in the baby tub. I took tons of pictures, but there wasn't a "cute" one in the bunch. Mostly, Sam just had these funky expressions on his face. That's the way it is with newborns - they scrunch their faces around all the time. Frequent cuteness is still a few months down the road.

Emma was fascinated by Sammy in the tub.

"Aren't we done yet?"

A fuzzy head, just like a baby chick.

Gil in Carnival

2010-04-21T23:47:00.005-06:00

The week Sammy was born, Gil was one of the lead actors in the Rock Springs High School production of the musical Carnival. It's a tale of a young ingenue who comes to the carnival looking for work. There, she meets a magician and a puppeteer, and by the end of the musical, must choose which one she loves. Gil played the puppeteer, a grumpy bitter man who was once a famous dancer, but now whose glory days are over. Through his puppets, he woos the young woman, and by the end of the musical, they are in love. Gil did a great job! It was a lot of fun for him, and it was a great feeling of success to get to play such a big role in the musical.

Thursday, April 8, was opening night, and my Mom got to go see Gil in the musical.

Dani and I were there, too. I brought Sammy, who was kind enough to his mother to stay asleep the whole play.

This, and the rest of the pics, were taken by Sue, when she came down on Saturday, April 10. She brought her kids, and she, Lily, and Dani got to go see Gil perform in the musical.

One Week Old

2010-04-14T21:04:00.004-06:00

Baby Sam was one week old yesterday. Happy One Week Birthday!

It's subtle, but I think his face is changing and filling out already. Love me a chunky baby! He was 8lb 4.9 oz. when he was born, 7lb. 12 oz. when he left the hospital, and 7lb. 15 oz. when I took him to our doc's office for a weight check Monday. By his two-week birthday, I bet he's over his birth weight. Keep chugging that formula, baby!

It feels like time is getting away from me in great rushing torrents down a mighty river, and all I have to hold it is a thimble. My sweet baby Sammy. There is hardly enough snuggling time.

Connor is my most hard-headed, but he is also my best snuggler! He's always coming up and kissing Sam on the head, and saying, "Awww, Baby Sam is so cute!"

Even the teenage boy loves the cute baby.

I forgot to get pics of Dani and Emma with Sam yesterday, but Dani is definitely the Mom's Assistant when it comes to Sam, even to the point where I feel like beating her off with a stick so I can have my own snuggle time with Sam. Emma notices Sam every now and then throughout the day, calling him by name and looking at him, but she mostly just likes knowing that Mommy and Sammy and everyone are there, and that all is right in her world so that she can go do her own thing. And Zen was at work yesterday, out in the oil fields. Although, he did get to come home for a few hours. Tonight was the same, and he got a little snuggle time with Sam, and decided that he was the Daddy Hot Rock, more than able to keep Sam snuggly warm on his big chest.

Picking Your Battles

2010-04-14T15:39:00.001-06:00

Oh man, Monday was super emotional! Let's go back a few days, to the first night home from the hospital. It was really draining the first day back home. I was moving around like a cripple from my c-section surgery scars, and trying to give enough attention to all my children. Then, that night my Mom, Dani, and I went to see opening night for Gil's play. I had to send them out the door instead of us all going together, so I could finish nursing Sam. I was a couple minutes late, and I forgot to bring my camera, but I got to see Gil's play and Sammy stayed asleep the whole time. Thank goodness! At the hospital, Sam was a really good nurser, had maybe one or two slightly rough patches with that, but basically everything was wonderful. But Thursday night, I must have spent three or four hours nursing him off and on, trying to get him to go to sleep, so I could sleep. I was so strung out, I just thought, "I can't have nights like this, I have too many other things to take care of, too many needs to meet." So, I cracked open the can of formula, and filled up his tummy with a bottle. Long story short, that was the beginning of the end of the nursing. Sam's appetite was picking up, and with the trouble I have always had with my milk supply, I just didn't want to string out the struggle to be a nursing mother, and I began supplementing him with formula after every time I nursed him. If I was super, super determined to nurse him, I should not have given him formula for nearly another two weeks, but he would have been starving (Emma kept losing weight the first few weeks I tried to nurse her, and I just didn't want a repeat this time) and it would have been a big drain on me emotionally to keep going, fighting a baby's hunger and frustration. Just not possible with four other kids in the house to keep up with, even if the teenagers are helpful, which they truly are.

I don't know why I keep doing this to myself, but with the birth of every one of my children, I have this vision of "true motherhood" or something, and I can't help but try and make myself a good nurser, despite experience to the contrary. It's always so emotional to start the formula, it makes me feel like a failure, even though I know it's illogical. It should be about what's best for the baby, not what my emotional needs are. So, for several days, I just kept trying and trying to keep the nursing going, even though Sam quickly screamed and cried every time I tried to nurse, and soon he just quit trying, going to sleep instead of seriously trying to get any milk out of me. By Monday, I knew the nursing was over with, and I've only been nursing him for a few minutes several times a day since then, just to take the edge off my overly full breasts. Yeah, I know, it sounds like I have lots of milk for him, but trust me, it's not anywhere near what he would need, even if he was still willing to nurse. But I was very weepy Monday.

And then Dani and I had some wonderful moments just sitting and watching tv together after school Monday. Big Ben was on a show, and that led to a conversation about the building of the Salt Lake Temple, and that led to Dani pouting because she'd gotten some historical facts wrong and she hates being wrong, and that led to my trying to console and sooth her emotions, and then telling her the wonderful things about her (she's so helpful to other children, she's fun and bubbly, and she's strong.) Drama queen stuff, I know, but she's a teenager, and a girl at that. But we love her. It was a random moment, but I felt really warm and close with her. I was weepy during this, too. But then later, Dani was cranky and strung out during Family Home Evening, and that made me cry for an entirely different, and not happy, reason. So, everyone went to bed early that night, and when I woke up the next day with a little more sleep under my belt, I was better and a little more positively resigned to having Sam be a bottle-fed baby. Sometimes, you just have to pick your battles.

The Great Zen Daddy Helper

2010-04-14T15:00:00.003-06:00

Enough words cannot be said about how awesome Zen was the week or so he got to be home for Sammy's birth. He helped switch the two bedrooms upstairs (a major undertaking we'd been talking about for months) so Gil could finally be in a room by himself, took care of kids while I was in the hospital (he did get sick of being the chauffeur, though), cleaned our bathroom, kept the house picked up, and did a LOT of laundry.

My brain was out to lunch this day, or I would have taken "before" and "after" pics, but on Friday, 2 April, we all pitched in and switched the two upstairs bedrooms. In the big room had been Gil and Connor, and in the small room had been Emma and all the toys. Here is Zen, taking apart the bunk bed in Gil and Connor's room, in preparation for moving it into Emma's room. First, we moved everything in Emma's room out into the tv room, then moved Gil's bunkbed into Emma's room, and then moved everything from the tv room into the big bedroom, which is now Connor and Emma's room. A friend in the ward had coincidentally the week before given us a twin bed she was no longer using. Count your blessings! The frame is pink, but we are not complaining. Maybe we will paint it this summer. Now, there is less tension at bedtime, because Gil can lollygag like a teenager and stay up later without keeping up Connor, while Connor and Emma can now go to bed at the same time and sleep in the same room, which Connor often begged for, anyway. Kismet!

I wish I'd gotten pictures of Zen folding laundry, but we'll have to settle for a picture of a clean laundry room. Okay, it's not spotless, but if you had any idea of how it usually looks, you could more fully appreciate how industrious Zen was.

Here's one of Zen just this past Saturday, helping Mac and Connor get some lunch. Go Mr. Mom!!

I LOVE YOU SWEETIE!!!!!!

Since We Came Home, First Bath

2010-04-14T14:05:00.007-06:00

The first night home was draining, but I'll talk about that in the next few posts. Mom went home Friday afternoon, after visiting with Zen's parents, who came down to see Sam and to attend Gil's performance in the high school musical, Carnival. Again, there will be a separate post for that, and will also mention Sue's visit, with her kids, to see the play Saturday. But here are Zen's parents, Ron and Rose:
This makes the thirteenth, and probably last, grandchild for Ron and Rose. But great-grandchildren are probably not far behind. That is not an annoucement of ANY variety. Thank you very much.

I debated Sunday morning whether or not to go to church, but it worked out that I finished feeding Sam at just the right time to allow me to shower, get dressed, and help get the other kids ready for church. Dani and I also took a few minutes to give Sam his first sponge bath at home:

Dani loves to be the Sammy helper, developing and practicing her nurturing skills.

Aren't we done yet? It's frosty out here!

I hurried and finished up, so we could get to church. Miraculously, we walked in just when it started.

A little Mommy milk, a bottle, or even a bink would help. Sam loves to suck on his hands when nothing else is available. That might be all that movement I felt low in my abdomen the last month of my pregnancy, even though he was head-down. He must have been moving his hands like crazy.

Naked babies are so cute!

I meant to get a picture of Sam in his first outfit to church, and by the end of Sunday night, I was regretting not having gotten a picture of him, but when I downloaded the pics last night, I discovered someone had me covered after all. Was it Connor or Dani? This outfit was from my Mom, the Grammie, along with some other fantastic, and fantastically needed, newborn clothes she picked up at Wal-Mart. She was a great help last week. I'm so glad she was here, too.

Done At the Hospital

2010-04-13T23:57:00.002-06:00

Odds and ends from the last two days in the hospital:

I finally got to eat "real" food the next day after Sam was born. I was so sick of 7-Up and Jello!

Connor loved playing with the bed controls. He's so curious, he has to know how things work. Emma was just a monkey, and it was hilarious to watch them be glued to the tv in the room. Mom, who's Mom?

Emma was very cranky and upset whenever she visited at the hospital. If she could talk very well, I'd bet she'd say, "I miss you! When are you coming home. I'm so mad that you are not there!" P.S. - That's marker on her face.

Blizzard conditions the day Sam was born. And that led to...

My Mom has this tradition of picking out teddy bears to represent each one of her grandchildren. While browsing the selection at the hospital gift shop, she found this bear with nice frosty blue and white fur, just perfectly representing the frosty day Sam was born. Emma is really into stuffed animals these days, and she loved to hold the Sam Frosty bear.

Emma was enchanted with her new baby brother Sam...

...or maybe just his bink. She's been a notorious binky thief ever since we brought Sam home.

Zen and I got to have the traditional couple's dinner served up by the staff of the hospital cafeteria. Dani and Mom stayed home with Connor and Emma, so it was like a real date.

The day we left the hospital, Thursday. You'd never know it was blizzarding two days before. That's spring snow in Wyoming. On the left is the o.b. wing, where Sam was born and I recovered, and on the right is the main entrance.

All packed up and ready to go. The whole hospital had undergone a renovation recently, and the o.b. wing was new and spiffy. It was a lovely room to stay in. Some people hate staying in the hospital, but I love it, because I get a break from having to take care of things, and people are there to help me and get me what I need.

We had the hardest time picking out a middle name for Sam. We were just having no vibes whatsoever, be it family names or any other source. The last bit of paperwork to finish filling out before we left the hospital was the info for the birth certificate. Zen wrote some names on the dry erase board in my room, just names he, Dani, and I liked.

It took forever, but we finally narrowed it down to Samuel Zachary Allred.

Dani dressed Sam in his going-home outfit. Isn't she so beautiful? You get a glimpse of what she will look like when she's a woman. I catch myself looking at her, or she catches me looking at her, at random moments, and this is what I'm doing - imagining her as a woman, and the happy feelings it gives me. Dani often says, "You're doing it again!"

These are the three receiving blankets I sewed for Sam, with burp rags. Before and during the sewing, Emma took such a liking to the froggy fabric, that I wound up finding some more froggy fabric, but with a pink background, at Wal-Mart and made a pink froggy blanket just for her. It's because her favorite movie right now is the Princess Frog.

Dani helped to sew them. We worked on them while we listened to General Conference the weekend before Sam was born.

Baby Sam all packed up and ready to go. It was stressful getting out of there, because I invited the older kids to come and be with us when we took Sammy out of the hospital and took him home, but there were all these little details to take care of, like picking the middle name, and admittedly, I made it worse by trying to take just one more picture, and shooting a little video of the hospital room before I left. Zen and Gil were waiting out in the car with Emma, who was freaked out, and crying in her car seat.

It was good to be home and for everyone to have Mommy back, and there wasn't a medical reason to stay, but I have to say, a part of me wished I could stay alone at the hospital one more day, or maybe a week?

Photo Shoot a la Susie

2010-04-09T23:10:00.001-06:00

Featuring the wonderful work of Sue, photographer extraordinaire, and her able assistant, Grammie!

It was a lucky thing that the weather was so bad Tuesday, closing down the interstate, that Sue stayed the night Tuesday, and so had time Wednesday morning for these wonderful pictures! There were so many to choose from, it was hard to narrow them down, so I picked a bunch!

Day One Part Two

2010-04-07T21:15:00.009-06:00

Sue did a great job with the first baby post, but the thing with having a super-duper professional photographer present for the birth of a child, is that there are a TON of cute pictures to choose from, nearly 600! I feel like papering the walls of the house with Susie's great photos! I can't resist throwing in another post of pics.

I'm starting off with a few pics, from my camera, taken the night before the delivery.

I experimented the week before with pizza, and came up with a yummy recipe for spinach mushroom pizza. So, I served up a pizza treat for my Mom and sister Sue the night before baby Sam's delivery.

Zen and the kids all turned off our media, and we had some family together time with Mom and Sue, and played Apples to Apples. Connor and Emma got into the action, in their own way.

It was blizzarding like crazy the morning of the birth, bitter cold wind blowing snow all across the road. I'm glad we live in town, instead of miles away from the hospital. We got into the hospital around 6am, got checked in, and the nurses started prepping me for the c-section.

My ginormo self, and I guess I look good in this pic. But, I was feeling nostalgic this past week about this pregnancy being the last one, and tried to enjoy all the wiggling from Sam despite the discomforts of moving around like a penguin.

The upside - I won't have to do this again, at least not for having babies.

"It's cold out here, and people keep messing with me!"

First snuggles

Sweet baby feet.

First yummies.

Meet The Family!

Gil had to share his MP3 music with Sam.

Connor and Emma went nuts exploring the room, and their favorite game was playing peekaboo in the coat closet.

That was our first day! We're so glad Sam is here, and I want to treasure every minute with him!

The Caboose Has Arrived!

2010-04-06T16:51:00.004-06:00

Aunt Susie, guest blogging:

It's been an eventful day at the Memorial Hospital of Sweetwater County in Rock Springs, WY. We arrived at the hospital just before 6:00am.

This is the last time you'll see Becky like this:

Yep, the tubes are tied and Baby Samuel is the caboose.

Since Becky knew this would be her last baby, she invited me to accompany her in the operating room for her C-Section so I could photograph the birth. It was awesome!

Especially my outfit:

After having done this whole C-Section thing twice before, Becky was totally relaxed and joking with the anesthesiologist as her surgery got underway.

Samuel (no middle name yet) Allred was born just a couple of minutes later at 7:39am.

He has a healthy set of lungs and did plenty of squalking while they cleaned him up.

Samuel has really long fingers and toes and is all ready for his first nail clipping.

Becky got to say a brief hello before the nurses took Samuel to the nursery to get weighed and measured while the docs sewed Becky up.

Happy to be in the warmer:

I was allowed to accompany Samuel to the nursery even though the rules say only the parents can go in. The nurse let me hang out and take lots of pictures even after Zen came in to meet Samuel. I got a kick out of him taking a cell phone pic to send to Gil and Dani.

Grammie stood outside the big nursery window taking lots of her own pictures and video.

Sam was quite alert after all of his initial tests. He weighed 8 pounds 4 ounces and measured 20 1/2 inches long.

Meeting Grammie:

After about an hour and a half Becky finally got to hold her sweet baby boy.

The proud Daddy making the "baby news" phone calls.

Becky and Sam are both doing well, resting off their birthing hangover. I'm sure Becky will have more pictures to post over the next few days.

Congrats, Becky and Zen, and thank you for letting me share in your final birth experience! Love you!

Baby Sam

2010-03-21T11:55:00.001-06:00

I was at my o.b. appointment this past week, and the doc and I were wrapping things up. I forget now what question he asked, but I mentioned that no, I didn't know what sex the baby was, although I really wished I knew. As it was, I was going to have to do all the shopping AFTER the baby was born. He took pity on me, and with a smile said we could go take a peek in the ultrasound room, no charge. So, he had one of his nurse assistants fire it up, and we met down the hall. I was so excited! Now I can do some of the fun things to get ready, make blankets and collect baby clothes. Sure enough, it only took a few seconds, after seeing that he was head down and that I had plenty of amniotic fluid, we could see that he was a boy, clear as day, all his little boy parts in the right place. Dr. Allyn did what he calls the "jello test," where he wiggled my belly, and baby's two little balls just jiggled right along. Kind of funny! But I was excited and pleased, smirking a little, because I thought, "I was right!!" I had the boy vibe all along, and I think I've been right with every kid. Not bad statistics! I've had a boy name picked out, practically from the beginning. Samuel. I have no idea what we'll pick for a middle name, but he's baby Sam for now.

Long Time No See

2010-03-09T15:25:00.001-07:00

Okay, for all intents and purposes, I haven't blogged seriously for nearly six months. I had a few posts, but that wasn't saying much. I've decided that I need to start doing this again, for my own sanity, to stay connected out there. I've changed my blog to a completely private blog. I know it's irritating to have to log in and all that jazz just to read it, but I have two reasons for switching from a public blog to a private blog: 1)I started to get lots of yucky junkmail comments on my blog which told me that weird people were reading my blog and 2) I have lots of private things to talk about that frankly, I just don't want the general public reading. So, that's that.

What's up with me, not blogging for six months? It's about two things, really, one is physical, and one is psychological. First, this pregnancy has really thrown me for a loop. I'm getting closer to 40, and for the first time, I'm feeling it. It's hard to put into words how being pregnant has completely sapped my mental and psychological energy. I've just been a basket case. When I first suspected I was pregnant, I went off my anti-anxiety meds (Cymbalta), because the included literature warned strenuously not to take it during pregnancy, because they didn't have a whole lot of data on pregnant women yet, being a newer medication. Five years down the road, after it's been in circulation a while, it will probably be more accepted. But anyway, that was contributing to the whole issue. Other physical changes - constant fatigue. As you guys noticed, my lose-weight thing went bust shortly after becoming pregnant, which you'd expect, but it wasn't just the normal issue of gaining weight in order to grow a baby. Any day I exercised, I would nearly pass out from exhaustion within an hour or two of exercising, so I quit. And that contributed to the whole ball of wax. I forget now when my sleep patterns changed, but at some point, my nights started to be really difficult. I wake up at least six to eight times a night to go to the bathroom, and then it takes me another 15 to 20 minutes, I'm guessing, just to fall back asleep each time. It's a bunch of little pieces of sleep. It probably takes me at least ten hours a day to get the rest I used to get in seven. Add some more recent late-night insomnia to the equation, and it's really a mess. Poor Connor and Emma watch a LOT of tv and eat too much popcorn, hot dogs, and strawberry milk while their mother lies in a stupor on the couch or in bed.

The second part of the equation, is the psychological. I don't even know how deep to go into this, or how to explain, but it's way, way more than just being off my meds. There are the completely random, non-sensical freaked-out feelings I get sometimes, that is usually alleviated a great deal by my meds, but it's a whole lot more. Having to quit daycare a year ago made things financially difficult for us, and I made it worse by thinking I could do the whole scrapbooking business thing again, buying a bunch of product on credit to resell it. Very few people can really make a good go of the home-business thing, and I am definitely not one of them, getting distracted a lot at home, never fully following up on all the ideas I have. I'm great working for other people, but lousy completely left up to my own devices. So, I carried around a lot of guilt and stress from that issue, still do. This was the second time I've made such a big mess of our finances, and I have been in constant despair over what to do with myself, where I fit in the universe. How could I be so stupid, AGAIN, how will I ever be right in the head? A whole lifetime of stupid just constantly parades across my mind, hour after hour, day after day. Why, Sue has asked, do I do that to myself, why not do whatever it takes to get over it already? I think because it's a bizarre kind of safety, if I just get down and stay down, I can't fall down and get hurt again or hurt other people again, even though being down hurts and is very limiting. I know my kids need me, and I love them, and that's about all that has held me to this earth for months.

Okay, so let's talk about things that are changing. In November/December I'd decided that I had no choice, that no matter how scary and stressful it was to undertake home daycare again, I was just going to have to do it. In December, I sold off, at big losses, most of my remaining scrapbooking supplies and tools, on eBay. It helped us to give Christmas to our kids, but none of it went towards our debt. The first few weeks of January, I started running ads in our local newspaper for daycare. I got a couple of calls, but nothing serious, and I was starting to wonder what in the world we were going to do. Frankly, I think there was some heavenly intervention going on there, because when I used to do daycare, I would get half a dozen serious calls, no problem, when I would run ads. But for three weeks, nothing, and frankly, I took this as kind of a hint. I was really in no condition to be taking care of other people's kids, anyway.

And right about then, the last week of January, Zen heard an ad on the radio for a seminar about learning to work at home as a medical transcriptionist. It's something that has been kicked around, so to speak, for a while (Zen has a cousin who does it), but I just didn't have the mental fortitude to track it down and completely research the issue and figure out what to do to get trained and employed. So, I went to the seminar, and frankly, it seemed like such a huge blessing, the right thing at the right time. It was a seminar put on by a trade-school type of organization based out of Colorado, called Weston Distance Learning, with a subdivision called At-Home Professions that handles the medical transcription. You completely study at home with their course materials, study at your own pace, and they have people who help you find a job working from home when you are done, which is exactly what I need right now, soon to have three little kids at home, and years before it's not going to cost me an arm and a leg for daycare. After the seminar, I spent a few days checking out At-Home Professions with various professional medical organizations and the Colorado Better Business Bureau, just to make sure they are legitimate, and everything looked good. They've been in operation for nearly 30 years, and have lots of experience, so I decided to go ahead. The training is split into 50 lessons organized into 5 main courses, and I'm just about to finish the first course, and start on the second. We're staying afloat right now with our tax return, but I'm under a little bit of a deadline, because that money won't last forever. I'm going to try to get through the second course, and into the third before the baby comes, and hopefully finish the whole thing by the end of May or June.

Speaking of which, I have my c-section tentatively scheduled for Tuesday, April 6th. We still don't know if it's a boy or girl. At my 20-week ultrasound, my doc looked and looked, but he couldn't tell. We could see all the working parts, from brains to stomach to ten fingers and ten toes, but the middle was just a blur. Personally, I think it's a boy, and we will name him Samuel, but of course, that's just an impression, not a guarantee. It's coming pretty fast now, and I will be so glad to not be pregnant any more. I want my old me back. I'm tired of having a sluggish body, I can't wait to exercise and have energy again. And I'm pretty sure this is the last one. I'm talking to my doc, and looking into getting my tubes tied. Enough is enough.

This pregnancy hasn't just been hard on me, it's been really hard on everyone else. As you can imagine, I just haven't been there very much for everyone, barely getting diapers changed, kids fed, and everyone in bed at night. The house has been almost a constant disaster for months, and I haven't been much use to anyone, practically or emotionally, and the strain has been showing, especially making my husband freaked out and lose it sometimes.

I spent several hours today, trying to track down some kind of counseling/therapy in this small town, that my insurance would cover. I finally found someone, who my bishop recommended. I got special clearance from my insurance company, since there isn't anyone in-network for a 100 miles, and will have my first appointment next week. I'm going to talk to my ob doc tomorrow about getting back on Cymbalta, since it probably won't hurt the baby at this point. I may also wait until my couseling session next week to start taking it again, since my therapist may want to prescribe something different, although I hope not, just because I already have three bottles of the stuff sitting in my medicine cabinet, totally paid for. What can I say, I'm cheap, about almost everything except scrapbooking supplies and Christmas presents.

And what's up with Jabba the Hutt? Yeah, that's pretty much how I am right now, a huge pile of useless goo. Sheesh.

Just Cruisin'

2009-11-30T19:49:00.004-07:00

2 Oct - Holey does love her hot dogs!

September 2009

2009-11-29T23:59:00.001-07:00

The orginal plan tonight, admittedly over-ambitious, was to get all caught up, from August to Thanksgiving, but I did get August and September done. 7 posts and over 50 pics! That ought to keep you busy for a while.

Besides the pleasant shock of Dani having matured into junior high, getting herself up at 6am and out the door by 7am, COMPLETELY by herself (her nauseated, exhausted, pregnant mother slept in), even from the first day of school, not much went on in the month of September. Here are a few cute pics:

Sometime buddies, except when Emma messes with his toys. But he always says, "Baby is my best friend, she's my friendship."

We went to Jenn's baby shower, which was fabulous, with many cute things. I was especially jealous of the frog/turtle quilt. But it was great to see family, and to shoot the breeze with my women family for an hour or two, sans children. Thank goodness for Dani and Gil, who came down with me that Saturday, and babysit Connor and Emma, so I could have a break. Love ya!

Just more cuteness from Emma. I always love the take-a-ride-or-play-peekaboo-in-boxes-and-baskets pics.

Emma got into the dress-up box and found a cowboy hat. Dani took a fancy to her cowgirl moment, and snapped these pics.

Good eye, Dani!

Ward Campout '09

2009-11-29T23:58:00.001-07:00

After the previous weekend, I was in no mood to camp, but we did go up Friday night, Aug 21, for our ward campout dinner, at one of the campgrounds around Flaming Gorge. I was also in the mood to break out some dutch oven skills, slight though they might be.

I was working on a cobbler. There was a little bit of a dutch oven cobbler contest, and I made mine with a bag of frozen mixed fruit, and a few cake mixes.

This is as close as Zen and I got to an anniversary picture this year. Here we are this night, just a few days away from our 17th anniversary.

Br. Sorenson, I think, brought this up from his work. It's his company's big cookout trailer, fully equipped and totally manned out. Maybe we could borrow it for next year's reunion. I wish.

No lack of testosterone here, ready to feed the masses. Cookin' out is man's work. Amen, sister, amen. They've gotta take a turn, sometime.

This is the entire summation of Dani's birthday this year - no cake and candles (we forgot to do it at the fam reunion and the bad weather completely put it out of our heads), but she got her very first ultra-texting cell phone, which later got water damage, and eventually was swallowed by her bedroom (or perhaps thrown in the trash by her baby sister.) Maybe Santa Claus will fix that problem.

Aaah, my favorite food in the world - buffet, baby, buffet.

Someone, the bishop I think, brought up corn fresh from Utah fields. And man, was it good!

Emma and her Dad's UW Cowboy hat. No sissy BYU hat, thank you, as someone else tried to put on her head.

Emma played Goldilocks and musical chairs all night, constantly roaming and sitting in any empty camp chair, especially the little kid chairs.

The collection of dutch oven cobbler entries.

I won!! But honestly, it would have been a LOT better with double peaches and raspberries per two cake mixes. Fun time! Maybe next year, we'll feel like camping overnight.

Reunion Campout '09

2009-11-29T23:39:00.002-07:00

Cox Family Reunion, 14-15 Aug 09, 29 pics, read it and weep. And you may want to, considering it hailed, and we were freezing. It was one of those, "Do you remember the year that...?" the few, the proud, who survived the campout. It's sort of like King Henry's St. Crispin's day speech in Shakespeare's Henry V:

"We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition;
And gentlemen in England now-a-bed
Shall think themselves accurs'd they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day."

It took us forever to find the campground, took a few wrong turns. Man, that place was out in the middle of nowhere. Friday night wasn't too bad, a bit cold and sprinkly, but still fun. Love me a campfire, one of my favorite smells in the world.

The first injury, I think. Connor ran around with a roasting stick, and poked Lily in the back of the head. Hope her tetanus shot was current.

It didn't take Emma long to get completely muddy.

This just illustrates how ill-prepared my little family was for this year's campout - all summer clothes and lightweight jackets.

Saturday morning, Katy used her best camping skills to build a nice fire, but in the end, she had to resort to Boy Scout water to get it going. Again, campfires are awesome.

Katy, Chris, and Liz came up with these cute, and ingenious dish bags we got to decorate, each holding one person's camping dishes, which hopefully we will all get to use again soon.

Cranky cookstove, but at least Katy and Chris got one of them working, and we all ate like kings.

For some reason, Mom looks like she needs an antler hat. I'm just saying.

Sausage and sourdough pancakes, mmm...

Yeah, I'm in a pic, but I look like a hag. Everybody looks like poo when camping, especially by the end. But hey, that's what camping is all about, right? Grunge?

Stretch! Why did we sleep in a tent? And where's the food?

Crusty morning crew, our tent in the background. As I recall, Gil slept in the truck, and froze his tooshie.

Gimmee some sugar!

Knowing Amelia, this much cheese is probably a fluke.

Little white flowers growing on the ground? No, that would be hail. It's after breakfast, and that's when it started hailing.

Ducking into the food tent, thinking it would all pass, soon.

Lily dancing in the hail. This was when it was still fun and novel.

Still in good spirits. Wait for it, wait for it.

Chris and Sedona stretching their legs.

Emma, playing the "I feed you" game, passing time.

Cold, wet, and muddy. This isn't fun anymore!

Connor and Avy stretching their legs.

When the hail turned into rain, and eventually soaked the food tent, that's when it all went downhill. Connor and Emma lost it and started non-stop bawling, and that's when I broke ranks, and began throwing everything into the truck to sort out later. I was so glad to be driving away.

Katy had some fun activities planned at the campground, but the bad weather drove everyone away, and most of us wound up at Mom's house. So, Katy busted out her activities there. I think the concept was toilet paper fashion.

"Big people suck!"

I'm not sure what her starting fashion was, but it wound up being a classic toilet-papering, turning her into a mummy.

Katy also had a marshmallow tossing game, but I think the game just turned into eating marshmallows.

Yep, Emma still likes marshmallows, maybe it started here.

Okay, reunion campout conclusions - I'll still camp with kids, but I seriously need to track down some kind of trailer, that is waterproof just in case, and where we can huddle in bad weather. And next time, I should prepare for near-winter temperatures. Still, props to the organizers. As miserable as it was, I didn't have to do much of the prep work, and there were a few bright moments. Especially the campfire and the going-home part.

Here's a weird thought - let's have a Girls' Weekend, camping without kids!!! Gabbing around the campfire, and no whiners to take care of! Might make me like camping again...

Two Girlies

2009-11-29T21:00:00.000-07:00

It's a toss-up as to who loves dressing-up Emma more - Emma or Dani. Whenever Emma finds necklaces or bracelets, she loves to put them on. And Dani loves to decorate her sister. Some kind of repressed girliness surfacing, because Dani was not much of a girly-girl when she was a toddler, hardly wanting to fix her hair until she got into elementary school, and girliness started to rub off on her, just a little.

14 Aug

Connor's 4th Bday

2009-11-29T20:52:00.000-07:00

Connor's 4th Bday, 9 Aug, celebrated here on Aug 11th:

Mmmm, hair tastes good with icing.

Transformers, but we wound up throwing them away several months later. They were way too complicated, and eventually broke, anyway. But he still loves the movie!

Dani was the funmeister, making the cake, and probably kicking us all in the butt to get a party going, and I was almost useless, except to take some pics.

Love Me Some 'Tatoes

2009-11-29T20:34:00.000-07:00

Fun pics at home - Emma mooching mashed potatoes, 9 Aug 09.

Allred Reunion Kitty

2009-11-29T20:25:00.000-07:00

Okay, my picture-taking started diminishing rapidly in the face of my pregnancy, and being in the start of my first trimester, so the only pics I have of the Allred Reunion, are the kids chasing after this wild kitten they found in the garden.

I loved all the daisies in Rose's garden. A plain flower, but cheery just the same.

The kids were playing outside, and kept hearing the pitiful meowing sound. The found the kitten hiding in the garden, and couldn't wait to show me.

Emma wanted that kitty really, really badly.

Classic baby - cry until you get what you want. And the kids tried to talk me into keeping the kitty, but I firmly refused. I think Jenn would be disappointed in me, but ever since the kids were little, I have had an aversion to taking care of pets. I hope Jenn will always love her critters. But I'm a crustier person than Jenn. Her pets are probably safe.

Well...It's Human

2009-11-18T23:48:00.002-07:00

Yep, had my ultrasound Monday, and nope, my doc couldn't tell which kind it was. But all the other parts seem to be in working order, and in the right place. So, we're looking at a surprise baby. But, it was a little bit of a stressful experience at the time, though. I picked Dani up from school, because she'd been begging to go with me. I thought it would also be good, because she could help me corral Connor and Emma. That was true, however, Connor was all over the place because we were in the waiting room forever, and then in the ultrasound room forever again, so he got really bored and was messing with stuff. Emma was going stir crazy, and when I laid down on the table, and put on the paper cover they give you for modesty, she flipped a monkey. So, Dani would up taking them both out of the room, and she missed the ultrasound anyway. I felt bad for her, but I was really glad she was there to help. If I have another ultrasound before my due date, Connor and Emma are not coming with me! And I should have realized they should not have come in the first place, but oh well. Hindsight is 20/20. I've got pics to post, but I'll see if I can do that tomorrow.

I was going to start being such a good blogger, but I've been working like crazy with my eBay auctions, and may not be a good blogger this week, after all. But at least I'll have dough to pay my bills.

Half Way There

2009-11-16T08:58:00.002-07:00

I'm now officially half way to baby. I've got my dr appt this week. I might find out if it's a boy or girl. My doc likes to wait forever on that issue, he does the ultrasound himself in his office, so he might not do my ultrasound until next month, but we'll see.

I felt the baby kicking me just this past Thursday night, and I was kind of relieved. It was the first time I definitely felt movement. It seemed kind of late this time around, compared to the others, when I'm sure I felt things several weeks earlier. I think I'm just so stressed out all the time right now, that I just don't notice something so tiny. But more on that later.

I want to blog more consistently. I need a little extra joy in my life. I got caught up on everyone's blogs last night and this morning, so I feel like I have extra permission to blog again. More tonight. Love, Becky

Wisdom or Weirdness?

2009-11-05T22:09:00.003-07:00

Connor did it again. Just a few days ago, he made a weird/interesting observation. Just a little bit after waking up, we're hanging out in the kitchen, and he says, completely astonished, almost irritated, "Mom, pee and poop control everyone!" The nerve of the human body! I said, "Yep, everyone has to pee and poop." The next bit was a little garbled, but went something like this, "Mom, I can use my eyes to stop the pee and poop." "Well, that probably won't work very well." He thought for a little bit, then he said, kind of offended, "There are little guys in my brain making me pee and poop!" Little boogers, getting in the way of his play time. "Actually, that's not so far from the truth." Connor just has this way of making the funniest observations, that while childlike, are always surprising to me, coming from a four-year-old.

What I Did On My Birthday

2009-10-26T23:59:00.002-06:00

I think karma kicked me in the butt today. The kids didn't remember my birthday, and when Gil figured out it was my birthday while I was talking to Zen on the phone, it kind of went in one ear and out the other: "When's your birthday?" "Exactly today." "Oh, okay." And on to the next item on his agenda. It's just bad karma. No big deal. I'm pretty scroogie about all kinds of celebrations, just don't get into hoopla in general, and so my kids are pretty non-celebretory. I feel sorry for my grandchildren already.

Today, I woke up (notice I didn't say got up), and lazed about in bed a little, reading. Then, when Emma woke up, I got up with her, read a little more, then decided to quit being a heathen, showered, dressed, fed the kids breakfast. I cleaned up a little, then drove a video over to Gil at the high school because he forgot to take it back, then went grocery shopping at Wal-Mart and Smith's (oh, goodie), came home, put away groceries, fed the kids lunch, had a nap that went on too long (I am just the nap queen now that I'm pregnant, was I ever this tired with the other ones? I'm getting too old for this business), read a little, made dinner, tried to watch an episode of Lie to Me while settling several arguments, made orange bread pudding, got the kids ready for bed, read scriptures with them, read stories to Connor, dished up some bread pudding, lazed in bed watching episodes of The Mentalist, thereby staying up too late, will pay for it tomorrow, and now I will attempt to fall asleep.

But my birthday gift was getting to hang out with my family women friends, scrapbooking this weekend, thanks in part to Dani, who did an awesome job babysitting at Grammie's house Friday night. Thanks, chick.

Will post on all that soon, when I finish my die-cut tree page. Katy knows what I'm talking about. It's the anal side of my personality coming out, not the side that takes care of my house, the house of shame.

A Rite of Passage

2009-10-09T22:46:00.001-06:00

Today, it was my job to take Dani to Parent Teacher Conference over at the junior high. Before leaving, I came upstairs dressed in my sweats (hey, they're my classy pair, blue with white racing stripes down the side), a t-shirt, and nice white tennis shoes. I put my coat on, and sat down to wait for Dani.

"Hey, let's get going!" I said, trying to get her to put on her shoes and coat.

She took one look at me, and said in that teenager way, "That's what you're wearing?!"

As we drove down to the junior high, the more I thought about it, the more it made me laugh. I have gone through a rite of passage. I have gained the ability to embarrass my teenage girl, just by by what I wear. Aaaaawesome. Later, Zen and I had to high-fived each other, so proud of our ever-increasing parenting skills.

Holy Monkeys! He's Driving!

2009-08-20T21:31:00.001-06:00

Well, since the fam reunion last weekend, two things have kept me out of the blogger world: one, I've had a bad cold and have had no motivation to do much of anything, and two, my laptop died! It's in the shop, and it will probably be Monday or Tuesday before I know what's wrong with it, and whether or not I've got to start saving my pennies for a new one. Which means I've had to duke it out, at least in theory, with four other people in the house for computer time (Zen, Gil, Dani, and Connor), and I just haven't had the energy to do it. So, I finally muscled my way in tonight, and I'll see what catching up I can manage to do.

Here's the "Holy Monkeys!!" moment: my teenage son has started driving. SAVE ME!!! We've been out a few times since yesterday, just going a mile or so around the neighborhood. It's probably a good thing my brain is a little out of it, and I feel buzzed from this cold, or I'd probably be more freaked out. I'll see if I can post some pics tomorrow.

Quitting a Job

2009-08-05T23:34:00.000-06:00

Quit my clothing repair job yesterday. What?! Okay, I was sitting at my sewing machine Monday, working on replacing a zipper in this winter coat, and I swear, I thought I was going to have an aneurism from picking out all the stitches, three rows on each side of the zipper. And yes, I was using a seam ripper. It took me almost three hours, start to finish, to complete the project, and I thought, "This is stupid, this is soooo stupid." First of all, I hated doing the work in the first place. And for only eight bucks an hour? $90 to $100 in two weeks? Are you kidding me? Add that to the fact that I know most people do not want to be paying $20 to $24 for a replaced zipper, and you know the laundromat wants to be making money, too. I've under-reported my time on several projects, just because I didn't want to make the dry cleaner's pay too much for an item. Add my time going back and forth to the laundromat. And you know, I'd just had enough Monday. I need to get rid of this stuff in my craft room NOW, and try to set up some kind of recurring sales, and the sewing was just getting in my way. I could make as much with that time, if not much more, easily doing something else, that is more enjoyable.

Then I was trying to explain this to Zen on the phone last night, who was telling me I should have leveraged for more money. But, dude, I just couldn't get across my point, and he pretty much told me I'd done something stupid. I was not amused.

Drug Addict

2009-08-03T23:12:00.002-06:00

Got bink?

I'd been looking for Emma's ladybug binky chain for what seems like weeks, and had even bought more binkies and made quickie binkey chains with ribbon/string and hefty diaper pins, and she just walks through the dining room tonight with it dangling from her mouth, totally casual. What the?!!!! She totally hid it in her special baby hidey place, wherever that is.

Anyway, I just clipped it on, with all the other binkies she was hauling around, switching from one to the other every few minutes. Makes me laugh.

Friends and Insecurities

2009-08-02T23:40:00.000-06:00

Note: Seriously, people, no commenting from anyone is giving me a complex.

Just a little random babbling tonight, after thinking about talking to people at church.

It's funny how you can totally mesh with some people, talking is super-easy, and with others, it seems like you are always off-sync. It kind of makes me sad, because there are a few people at church that I'd really like to get to know better, but it's like there's this personality barrier that prevents any real friendship from developing. I say stuff to them, and I get this blank look a lot, followed by a generic response. It's kind of awkward for me, especially when I'm trying to be light and funny, or something. I'm probably just being a dork.

Zen has been trying to get me for years to invite people over for dinner, and I just never do anything about it. Maybe I should. It's kind of hard right now, because his work schedule is so nuts, I don't have a lot of advance notice of when he's going to be home for dinner. But maybe I can make a more determined effort.

I had this kind of thought-provoking exchange with my sister, Sue, last night, which I've mentioned on my health blog, and while feeling mildly jealous of her having fun with friends out in Minnesota, it kind of reminded me how I've often envied her ease with people. It's not something I would EVER change about her, and frankly, she's one of the comforts in my life, due in large part to her personality and our background together, but watching her with her friendships reminds me that I don't have any close friends. Part of it's because I'm lousy at keeping up with people. I need to try harder. Friends are one of the great joys of life. And I just want to connect with people more.

Okay, babbling done. I spent most of the night tweaking the layout for my Becky's Kitchen Creations blog. I'll start adding recipes this week, and I'll keep you posted.

Secret Blogs

2009-08-01T23:59:00.003-06:00

Soooo, did anyone enjoy/hate the rant? Silence out there in Blogland makes me nervous. Katy, you got that I'm trying to agree with you, not yell at you, right? Katy? Hmmm....

Geez, so busy today. Read about it at my health blog post. Completely wore myself out.

What shall I write about tonight? Oh, I know! I must confess to a new, and weird compulsion, to start little blog offshoots. I think I have about a dozen now. Some of them are just blog names I wanted to reserve for the future, like "Good Is Good, Bad Is Bad." Go watch Thumb Wars, a spoof on Star Wars. It's a totally dorky film, but it's one of those family inside jokes we quote to each other all the time. I have no idea what I'd use that blog for, but it seemed funny at the time, so I reserved it. Maybe it could be my list of films I've seen, loved, hated, etc. But, who's got time for that?! Or, it could be a list of books I've read, loved, hated, etc. But that would be entirely too addicting. And besides, then I'd have to 'fess up to what I've been reading, so let's not go there, anyway.

Another one I made, is just a "dump all your crud in" kind of blog, the inner stuff you just feel like getting out somewhere, but you don't want anyone else to read it. Here's a quote from the only post I've made so far, "I've often thought about writing a journal, just for me, with things I don't want to share with other people, and I guess it amuses me to put it out on the net, sort of hiding in plain sight, and then not, but it will probably stay hidden, not because I know one darn thing about hiding info in cyberspace, but just because it wouldn't interest anyone but me. Definitely an analogy for me. I keep a lot of myself hidden from other people. There's got to be a place for my interior world." Why mention it here? Well, as my teenage son says, it's because I'm a " 'tard." I'll probably be tempted to delete this confession here on my general family blog.

And, I still haven't gotten around to Becky's Kitchen Creations, though I still really, really want to. Maybe tomorrow? Sigh...

And another one I want to make, is a Business Plan blog. I was talking on the phone to my sister tonight, and I was mentioning that when I am in Salt Lake in about two weeks, I want to stop in at the Quilted Bear, and look into getting a booth again, for cardmaking and mini scrapbook album kits. Boy, did she let me have it. Mmm, maybe it wasn't a total ream-out, but she did remind me how difficult, if not impossible, it is to make a go of handmade crafts. And I countered with, yes, I know the last time was kind of a failure, but that doesn't mean I didn't learn anything, and I think I can do a better job this time. An older, wiser, and stronger me, so to speak. Ala Colonel Sanders. And I think a written, thought-out business plan, with ongoing updates, might assist with that. Any ideas on a blog name? "My Craft Business Plan"? Something more witty, or cool?

P.S. 2:30am - Sorry, I just could NOT take the purple circles blog design one more second, but I want to do something cooler, but more subtle, brown and blue neutral tones. But, hey, it's 2:30 am, and I'm goint to bed. I'll be more creative tomorrow...

Personal Responsibility

2009-07-31T23:01:00.001-06:00

Warning - here comes a pretty rabid rant about personal responsibility.

Two things have set me off today. First one was this morning, when I found a mess in the toilet in the rec center restroom. What is sooooo hard about flushing, people?!!! You don't have a right to do things that negatively impact other people, especially things about which you have some choice and control. Second, was Katy's post about healthy food choices and fast food companies. Hello America!!! YOU are resposible for what you put in your mouth for food, NOT anyone else!! Everyone should have a basic grasp on the concept of advertising in this country. Companies try to make food seem delicious and appealing, regardless of whether or not it has too much fat or has a lot of nutritionally empty calories. It's YOUR JOB to engage your brain and THINK about your food choices. The ingredients to food these days is well known. Hamburgers and fries have lots of unhealthy fat, and very little nutrients to offer. It's not rocket science, people. You should know better!! Get fat if you want to, but quit blaming it on other people!

Now, let's get scary and rant about government and politics. Government is for basic civilization - basic laws for the protection of its citizens from the willful harm of other people, be they foreign or domestic. Said government must have some kind of funds to run itself, thus we have taxes. There is also a basic necessity to regulate public interactions, from roads to food production. And it's nice if the goverment will chip in to educate the rising generation. But a government DOES NOT HAVE THE RIGHT OR RESPONSIBILITY TO ENSURE A UTOPIA!!! People will sometimes, or frequently, make choices that cause harm to other people. It seems like government these days is trying to encourage that behavior by saying, "It's okay to make poor choices, we'll clean up the mess!" A government cannot make everything "all better." People just have to suffer the consequences of their bad choices. Unfortunately, the innocent suffer, too, but we cannot make things better in the long run, if those who make the poor choices are buffered from the consequences of those choices. Buffering them, or eliminating the consequences altogether, will only make things worse.

A lack of personal responsibility is a huge part of what is wrong our country, and in the world, today. And government needs to let the individual person shoulder more of the responsibility for keeping this country strong. Be willing to govern yourself, or someone else is going to run your life for you, to your everlasting detriment.

Satisfaction

2009-07-31T06:43:00.000-06:00

I've been doing this repairs-and-alterations thing for the dry cleaners over two weeks now. It was a little rough at the beginning, figuring out what to do with each piece, but like bike riding, the skills are coming back to me after a long hiatus. I've made a few mistakes, spending waaaaay too much time on some things, when I should have done something simple and quick, but overall, the satisfaction at having done a good job is immense.

Yesterday, I dropped off the latest batch of clothing, and sat in the back room of the dry cleaners with my sewing machine, working on a tricky piece of repair on a silk lingerie nightie. I usually do my sewing at home, but I needed to turn in the things that were due anyway, and wanted to consult with my manager, Johanna, on the nightie. The edges were fraying, and needed to be repaired with a serger, because a regular sewing machine will chew up the fragile edges, but I don't own one, and can't afford to invest in one right now. But I got this idea of using dissolvable interfacing to stabilize the edges while I zigzagged the edges. Wa-lah!! Worked like a charm. Then, when I was leaving, a woman came into the shop, needing a pair of business slacks hemmed up 9" (she was kind of short, and the pants had come with extra length so they could be hemmed for anyone), so I sat down with my machine, cut off the extra fabric, measured, folded the edges, and sewed a blind hem (you can barely see any stitches from the outside). 30 minutes, start to finish, and it looked professional. I handed them back to Johanna, and I was very satisfied with a job well done.

I can understand the appeal of getting yourself out of the house to go to work, where even a simple job can be satisfying if you do it well. Unlike raising children, which is complicated, messy, tedious, and very frustrating at times. Not to mention, terrifying when they wander off down the street while you're sitting in your craftroom. Close your eyes and put your hand over your heart. Sigh...

It's Dani All Over Again

2009-07-29T14:57:00.000-06:00

I just about had a heart attack today. I'm almost crying as I write this, as the full impact of what could have happened sinks in. Connor has turned into a roamer, just walking right out of the house whenever he feels like it, and right into other people's houses. No boundaries, or fear, that kid. Aaaargghhhh!!! And today, he let Emma, another roamer in the making, out of the house, where she wandered off down our street (a little strip that ends in a culdesac) and onto the next, where there is a lot more traffic. There were two adults and two teenagers in the house, and nobody had a clue what was happening. The only reason we are not at the emergency room right now, have cops on our doorstep (don't count that out, yet), or both, is that Connor came back into the house and told me she was out in the street. I walked out of the house, irritated, thinking she was on the sidewalk or something, but no, when Connor started riding his bike out towards the main road, I started running, a sinking feeling in my stomach. I found her a few steps off the edge, just watching all the drama, and there was a silver pickup truck stopped on her side of the road, blocking traffic, and two more cars blocking traffic in the other direction. I just ran up to her, picked her up, and just held her, not even able to look at anyone, I was so grateful and freaked out at the same time. Now that I look back, I didn't even wave thanks to anyone, I just carried her back to the house. I was having flashbacks to nine years ago, when Dani roamed all over the neighborhood, and was run over in the neighbor's driveway. But Emma is smaller, and in that traffic, she would have been squished like a bug, that's it, she's gone. There'd be a funeral this weekend. Okay, I think I will cry now, and then go install locks at the TOP of the inside of the doors, so neither Connor nor Emma can get out.

Teach 'Em To Cook

2009-07-28T23:47:00.002-06:00

Today, Gil asked me to make pancakes, as I have a lot this summer, but I was under such a deadline today, that I hurriedly told him to make some food for everyone, for once. After cooking an awesome breakfast (banana wheat pancakes, luscious omelet-style scrambled eggs, fresh fruit, and two types of juice), Gil says, "I am NOT going to be the cook in my house!" Uh, uh, uh! No, no, no! Gotta forget that I'm-a-man-and-I-don't-cook garbage. I told him he could help out his future wife, and improve upon his father's hot-dogs-or-take-out-pizza mentality. Besides, he loves experimenting with food, he even had a foods class in junior high about a year ago, which he really enjoyed. Gotta keep him going. Maybe I should make these kids take a night each week and cook dinner, just so they can learn some skills.

I couldn't pick one, soooo-

I guess this one's my favorite - "Yes, I am the Pancake Master!"

Dani Finally Cleaned Her Room

2009-07-27T23:12:00.000-06:00

Okay, who besides Katy (thank you!), is reading my weight loss/health blog? Just curious. And I really want to get that recipe blog going, Becky's Kitchen Creations. One of the things that's helping my food issues right now is to experiment with food, kind of fun.

After three days of nagging (and making her favorite food, pesto linguine, and then telling her she couldn't have any until she cleaned her room), I finally got Dani to finish cleaning and sorting her room, so we moved the furniture. We are going to buy her a new bedding set, and paint the walls (heaven help me!)

A room overwhelmed by a mother's excessive craft supplies, and a tweenie's slobby mess.
Ditto.
Wahoo! She is so excited about her new, streamlined room. Let's hope it's easier to keep clean. I wish you could see how much junk she threw out, probably two black yard bags worth of plain junk. I've got some Polly Pocket stuff, Bratz, and play clothes we'll be bringing to the reunion. Dani is definitely out of the little girl stage, and into the teenager stage. She has a wonderful Build-a-Bear collection, but we are going to sell in on eBay to see if we can help pay for her bedding and paint.

I'm So Glad When Daddy Comes Home

2009-07-26T22:17:00.000-06:00

Zen walked in the back door, just before lunch was ready today. It was so great to see him! I was missing him. But he goes out in the field again tomorrow in the wee hours, to go to Man Camp (that name still cracks me up!) It's always a mixed blessing - when he's gone, we miss him, but I know he's taking care of us by putting a roof over our head and food on the table, but when he's here too long, I worry because I know he's not making enough money to pay our bills. I hope someday we can be out of this frustrating, and heartwrenching, cycle.

Emma snuggled up to Zen, screeching for a sip of his soda pop.

But she was not amused with the delivery system.

See, bawling until the problem is fixed is the #1 weapon in a baby's arsenal. Love you daddy!!

When Dani came home from Girls' Camp, she noticed that Emma had molars. What?!! How come I didn't notice that? Although, I should have been suspicious from the runny nose she's had for nearly a week now. Seems like it always accompanies new teeth, and I forget it every time.

I Was in the Zone Today

2009-07-25T23:59:00.001-06:00

Short and sweet post today. I got up, exercised, came home, bossed kids to help me clean the house. Love a clean house!!! I think it really helps overall mood and productivity. I worked on various things, I forget now, but I just stayed productive.

Zen called me while I was working out. He's in Pinedale right now, about 1-1/2 hours drive away, and he wanted us to come visit him so he could show us the town and take us out to eat. My first thought was, "Are you kidding, you're coming home tomorrow!" But I grumbled and told him I would ask the kids. But as the day progressed, I thought more and more about how hard Zen works for us, and it would be fun to spend some of the day with him. But, the teenagers protested a long car ride. Really, 1-1/2 hours?!! You guys have no idea. When I was a kid, we traveled for DAYS in a vehicle, and we liked it, darn it! Except when my dad randomly pulled over to take pictures, then we did lots of bellyaching. Besides, I figured I could save the gas money and out-to-eat money for when Zen is here this week, and we could take the kids to the county fair.

I finally got ready to sort through all this beading junk, and I really got into it, slashing the "keep" pile like crazy (Sue, you would be proud!) I didn't finish it all, but I'm pretty sure I'll be able to ship this stuff out Monday, and it will be this HUGE load off my mind, so I can concentrate on bringing in money selling off all this scrapbooking stuff. Go, go, go!!!

P.S. Jenn, I only went to Wal-Mart four times this week. Aren't you proud of me?

Drama Queen Is Back

2009-07-24T23:26:00.002-06:00

I'm about to fall over at my computer, I'm so tired. Dani got back from camp today. I missed the deadline to make a big "reveal" out of her bedroom, but she was excited I was doing it anyway. I got all my stuff out of her room, but it hardly made a difference, because then I made the mistake of opening her closet. Apparently, any cleaning effort she's made in the past few months, has been stuffed into her closet. I should have taken a before pic, but I did take a pic of everything I pulled out of the closet:

It was so much worse than it looks. It was like she'd taken everything she owns and just threw it in the closet, even tiny little earring pieces. I found a set of Lia Sophia earrings that Lora had given some time in the past. For shame! I confiscated it on the spot. If I find the other earrings, I'm keeping the set. Please tell me the "messy" stage isn't permanent.

This is exactly how I feel. Could I crawl in bed, please?!!!

I've promised Dani a new bedding set, and that we will paint her room. She says she found one set online that she really likes, and that she's willing to help paint the walls. It should be interesting.

It didn't take us long to be at each other's throats, once she was back. "I wish I was back at camp!!!!" was the reponse she made to us, whenever we were on her nerves. Drama Queen is back!

Making Some Headway

2009-07-22T23:59:00.003-06:00

Dude, 1:40 am, must sleep. I did good today, kept my flow going, although I had some spots where I wasted too much time with random things on the internet. Some days, it seems like I'd be better off not turning the dumb thing on in the first place.

There's more stuff on my health/exercise blog. Lost two more pounds today!

But, I'm making some progress getting rid of this craft stuff. See, Dani's room is a disaster, 'cause she's in that teen "I'm a slob" phase, at least I hope it's not permanent. The craft junk I have stored in her room isn't helping either, and she's been begging to rearrange her room. She comes home from camp tomorrow, and I want to surprise her with a cleaned-out-of-her-mom's-stuff rearranged room. Therefore, I need to move my craft stuff out of her room into my bedroom, but I've got to move the craft stuff from my bedroom out to the garage, which I accomplished tonight by rearranging and tidying the garage, and then moving the stuff from my room out to the garage. I'm going to try to do as much as I can before she gets home tomorrow, sometime around lunch. Here's hoping!

BeforeMan, when did we acquire so much junk? It's some kind of scary mark of adulthood, the amount of stuff you acquire, and then sits gathering dust in the garage. Remember when everything you owned fit in a suitcase and a couple beat up boxes?

AFTEROkay, maybe it's not that impressive, and you might have to live here to appreciate it, but now we can reach the tool bench without climbing over things, a huge bonus. What in the world can I do about that ugly oil stain on the floor, a bad scar left by Zen's broken car.

'Night y'all!

Zen Made a Funny

2009-07-22T23:59:00.000-06:00

Sue - no comment, indeed. Your silence is deafening, and probably should continue, at least on that blog post. 'Scuse my shopping issues. But you better stay chatty on everything else!

Got up at 6:30 am with baby, and finally took myself in to my craftroom to finish some sewing repair that was due today. Took my stuff in, got lots more to do. Amen! Maybe I'll have a decent paycheck in a few weeks, well decent enough for an at-home piddly part-time job, anyway. Then I went to the Rec Center. I was too late to get the body bar class, but I punched up things on the elliptical, so it was worth it. Then, back home, taking care of kids, doing lots of little this and that all day, but I didn't goof off or anything. I made a great early dinner for Zen at 4pm - steak, potatoes, salad, & banana bread. I tried to catalog some things in my craft after 5pm, but Connor and Emma were driving me bananas! Some times, you can't get anything done with little children, especially when they are in the tear-everything-apart stage like Emma is. Briefly ran Gil over to the college, where he's working the sound board for a play. But, I gave up after 7pm and put the two little ones in the bike trailer, and rode over to the library. When they closed at 8pm, we went outside on the grass, but soon the mosquitos were feasting, so we went home. Then, it was various bits of this and that, like feeding and watering kids, getting kids ready for bed. Then I finished cataloging some things, and now I'm writing my blog posts before I go to bed.

Okay, you know that statement that no one is a good mother/parent after 8pm (Sue, you know who said it)? Getting kids in bed is the worst part of the day, because they are determined to stay up late, I'm tired, my brain hurts, and I just flip out and go into drill sergeant mode, and kick their butts in bed. I think sometimes, "I'm a nice person, really!" Ughhh.

Funny conversation last night when I came to bed:

Zen (groggy from already falling asleep) - "Honey, free snuggles!" (meaning cuddling without leading to you-know-what)

Becky - "There's no such thing as free snuggles."

Zen - "It's not my fault you always want more."

Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha! Soooo funny, because the opposite is true, our roles are usually reversed. Zen made a funny!! I laughed over and over. Just one of those inside-joke conversations you can have with a great sweetie!

Hey, Jenn, I stayed out of Wal-Mart today! Like, no way!

done, 12:45 am, go to sleep!

Dani Off to Camp

2009-07-21T23:45:00.000-06:00

Hot Stuff!
Well, I kissed a girl goodbye this morning, figuratively speaking. I tried to hug and kiss her last week, and she told me to stop. "I'm too old for that!!" Geez. But at least all the other kids are still snugglers, even that big teenage boy. Dani is waaaaaay too into her independence. Dani is off to her first Girls' Camp. The Young Women leaders encouraged her to go, even though she doesn't turn 12 for about three more weeks. I think she'll have a great time. I sent her with my small digital camera. I'm crossing my fingers it comes back still functional, or even comes back at all. But I was willing to risk it, because I think she'll have some pics to treasure.

My body woke me up around 6:30 am this morning (remember I went to bed last night about 1:30 am?) I'm glad my body is willing to get up that early again, all things considered. Seems like I couldn't get up before 8 or 9 these past few months. I think I just lay there, thinking, and wondering if I was going to get up or not. I finally threw some clothes on, and hauled all the beading stuff to my bedroom to spread it out, intending to get around to sorting all of it:

It's the beading collection of shame.

So much I have to return, so much. Hey, let's do some beading projects at the family reunion!!! Okay, I'm kind of kidding, because I appreciate the irony here, and kind of not, because it would be a super fun thing for us, and all the kids, to do, sitting around a camp table or two. That reminds me, are there any picnic tables at the campground? Do we want to braid leather keychains or anything? Just an idea. And I don't want to hear anyone mocking me for wanting more supplies when I'm returning so much. JUST SHUT UP. Here are a few projects I found:
Braided leather necklace - Okay, just a simple, braided necklace, we could easily change the pendant, or just remove it, make it short for a bracelet, or even shorter for keychains. Supplies wouldn't cost that much (geez, quit mocking me, you Dave Ramsey Nazi's!), and I bet we could do projects for as cheap as $2 or $3 a piece, and the nicer ones probably wouldn't cost more than $10 each, depending on what pendants and beads you want to add.
Dragonfly keychain - it's not leather braiding, but Sue, this reminds of of Sam C.

I think I'll skip all the detail about what I did today, just suffice it to say, I didn't waste time. I stayed busy, which is kind of the point, biking to the car dealership to get Zen's car, shopping at Wal-Mart, helping kids, then cleaning the kitchen & making bread. I sat down and looked at my email, which led to blog comments, which led to reading the weight loss blog Sue mentioned in her comments. Then around two, I focused on getting my sewing work done. I made dinner around 6:30, and somewhere around 7:30, the power went out. We ran to the library, which was closed, then came home and I just hung out in the driveway in a camp chair, watching the kids play. Then, picking up Zen from work, getting baby ready for bed, and now to bloggging. I still get distracted by so many things in the house, and with the kids, so I've got to work on staying focused, and structuring my days just like I worked at a job away from the house. But, Jenn I did go to Wal-Mart twice today. That makes three so far this week. Sheesh. When it's only five minutes from the house and is on the main drag, where I go to so many other places, it's no wonder I can wind up there practically everyday.

Emma got into the baby supplies box in the pantry, and drug out all the smaller binkies she's outgrown.

So many binkies, but only one mouth. What's a girl to do?

Emma LOVES hotdogs, almost as much as chocolate. Just give her one, and she takes off running around the house, all jazzed up with her travel snack.

Whew! Busy Day

2009-07-20T23:59:00.001-06:00

Boy, it's 1 am, so I'll be quick, because tomorrow is going to be crazy, too.

Check out my new health/weightloss blog Battle For 200 & Beyond. I made my first post. Basically, it will list everyday what I eat, what exercise I do, and any other tidbits to share, such as tips I learn or feelings I'm having, etc.

Quick & dirty replay of today:

I got up at 6am this morning, and spent two hours meticulously planning an order with Notions Marketing. A few months ago, I placed an order, getting a batch of Wilton's long loaf pans, because they are such a great shape for making sandwich bread, square and just the right size. I finally got around to bringing the box of them to Relief Society yesterday, and they went like hotcakes, with requests for at least four more. I determined I wanted to order some more for my sisters, but I didn't want to order more stuff I didn't need or couldn't sell, so I tried to narrow it down to things I would actually use and/or sell easily.

Then, it was getting ready to exercise, talking to the kids, going to the Rec Center, coming home, more kids, showering and dressing (Oh! - as I was dressing, so was Zen, and I was trying to say something cheesy and cute about having a big naked man in my room, and Zen said something along the lines of "I don't think we fit into the attractive naked category anymore." As if we ever did. It just struck me as really funny at the time.) Then, we signed some more papers at the dealership for Zen's truck. Yes, the story is coming, maybe tomorrow. We did the shopping together at Wal-Mart (now that I'm trying to blog daily again, Jenn, you can count how many times I go to Wal-Mart in a week.) I kind of enjoy shopping with Zen. It's almost like a date.

We came home, and I prepared some cute treat bags for my VTs, because I felt crafty. My VTs came, then I ran to Smith's for a few groceries. Then, I started on my sewing repair work. I cooked the pizza around 3:30 pm, and at 4:20 pm I ran Zen to work. I came home and finished my sewing repair for the day, then drove it down to the dry cleaner's. I came home and tried to help the kids with various things. I tried to get ready to take Connor to the Rec Center, as I'd been promising all day, but we got there too late and they were closing. Sigh... I'll have to take him tomorrow. I was just glad he didn't throw an unholy temper tantrum. Then, it was washing some dishes, reading scriptures with the kids, and cooking kettle corn for Dani to take to Girls' Camp tomorrow for her shared snack. Now, blogging and going to bed. Whew!

Declaration of Intent

2009-07-20T00:11:00.007-06:00

Sue posted a bunch of comments on my blog a few days ago. No, I haven't blogged very much recently, I've pretty much been a slacker this summer, but Sue's flurry of comments reminded me that I should get my act together, again.

Okay, let's see if I can get myself back into the the swing of things. Basically, there's been a hugely needed restructuring of my days that I have been avoiding for several months, but I've had a ginormously pathetic case of procrastination. I HAVE GOT TO CLEAR OUT THIS CRAFTROOM!!!! It's the huge elephant in the room of my brain, so huge and stinky, that I have NOT wanted to deal with it for a long time. Totally tried to ignore it was there. So I need to return an embarrassing amount of jewelry supplies that I ordered so I can get my money back, sell off this stuff I've been threatening to do for months and months and months, and just streamline this place, so I can get it out of my brain!

Ever since I had to close down my daycare in January, I knew I had to get this stuff done. But, various economic boons allowed me to postpone the inevitable: Zen's bonuses at work and our tax return to name a few. But our finances have reached critical mass, and I have to face up to reality, in a BIG hurry.

There are several things I can do to in order to bring in some dough on a consistent basis. First, when I was out last week, picking up Zen's suit from a local dry cleaner's, I asked them if they needed anyone to do repairs and alterations. The manager was excited to see me, and long-story-short, I am now doing that part time. At this point, I can't imagine it's going to bring in more than a few hundred a month, but it's better than nothing. Zen teased me that after eleven years of owning my sewing machine, I'm finally going to make some money using it. Another idea that I've had is that with the current upsurge in ebooks, there might be a demand for people who can take old books and convert them to digital format. It's basically a whole bunch of typing, and maybe some basic software knowledge. Maybe that could leapfrog into some kind of editing work. I could finally make use of my English degree, after all.

So, expect the daily logs to pick back up. Also, I need to blog about a few recent things - Zen's new truck, and our trip this weekend to Star Valley for Zen's grandmother's funeral.

I've also created a health/fitness/weight-loss blog for myself at http://battlefor200andbeyond.blogspot.com. There's nothing there yet, but I'll see if I can keep up a daily log for myself that's just about what I eat, what exercising I do, my weight (gasp!!), etc. Just a motivational thing, where if I make myself 'fess up to what I'm doing, or not doing, I might get myself in better shape.

Happy Fifteenth!

2009-07-05T23:59:00.000-06:00

Okay, people, here are FIVE blog posts, some of them REALLY long, to keep you busy reading and commenting (hint, hint) for a few days.

Gil turned fifteen today. ~~CRUD!~~ HOORAY! Now he's going to start bugging me to get a learner's permit, because now he can legally apply for one. When in the unholy monkeys did that happen? I am NOT old, I am NOT old, I am NOT OLD!!!

Gil's only birthday requests were a copy of an old computer game, Warcraft II, and an awesome dinner, steak and shrimp, complete with cheesecake for his birthday cake.

Homemade cheesecake, a family classic. Thanks for the recipe, Mom (Grammie)!

Fourth of July Mini Campout

2009-07-05T23:58:00.001-06:00

We did a little more this year than just lighting fireworks in the street. We did a mini-campout at Flaming Gorge. We packed up the van around 4pm and headed down to Flaming Gorge, on the west side of the lake, and turned into the Buckboard camping/marina area.

It's a great camping area, with these great covered picnic tables, fire pits, and public restrooms, amen.

Setting up "camp."

Zen brought scraps of wood from our garage, and parts of the ancient wood playground we demolished in our backyard last year. First, Gil was in charge getting things cut into smaller pieces, then Dani joined in trying to light the fire with matches, one at a time (this concept was not working). Zen helped out cutting wood while stacked kindling and tried to light various little things, like grass and paper plates, on fire.

Finally, Big Daddy Zen got the fire started, even without "boyscout water" (i.e. lighter fluid.)

Gil kept an eye on Emma, so she wouldn't fall in the fire. "Hot, baby, don't touch!"

Emma played musical chairs all night, falling out of them, as well as stumbling around in her awkward shoes on the uneven ground. By the end of the night, she was covered in scratches.

Little Miss Coolio!

Dani started the whole tree-climbing business, and soon, Connor joined her.

Zen's cracked-skin hot dog masterpiece.

Emma had been eating cold hot dogs all day, and by the end of dinner, she'd brought her daily tally of hot dogs up to four or five. I half-suspected they were going to make her sick, but she wouldn't eat anything else.

Dani's hot dog had some blackened skin on it, which she peeled off, and her poor hot dog was a mangled mess when she was through. Doesn't she know that campfire flavor is the best?!

Other people took an interest in the camera, for once, so I actually showed up in some pictures this time around.

Zen's s'more masterpiece.

Little messy face. Funny story, wish I had pics, but a few days ago, Emma discovered Zen's chocolate stash by our bed, and it was like giving her crack. She kept going back to his drawer for the next few days, looking for more chocolate. So, s'mores were right up her alley.

Okay, Connor's favorite game is "Tag, you're it!" which he does constantly, trying to get someone to play with him. Usually, I refuse to play, because my joints protest, but I took pity on him yesterday, and played tag. Doing it in slip-on sandals was stupid, as you can see.

OUCH!!!

Connor kept right on running.

I called him back for some snuggles. "See, Connor, Mommy needs some hugs." This is also an illustration of the downside of letting other people take pictures, you get to see your hugeness on film, not really a pleasant experience.

After packing up our "camp", we headed over to the lake, and everyone skipped rocks.

Again, Emma just wanted to eat dirt and jump in the lake, so we didn't let her walk around, but she sure loved splashing her hands in the water.

Sunset as we left, so beautiful. I love Wyoming sunsets. I should get this enlarged to hang on the wall.

After coming home, I gave baby a bath and put her in bed, then Zen took the kids to watch the city fireworks. Then, it was back at our house to light fireworks in the street.

Gil was so glad to be back in "civilization" where he could get cell phone service, and texted all his friends to see who could come over.

Gil brought out his old-fashioned root beer bottle he got at the Scottish Festival, and lit off bottle rockets.

I didn't have the patience to set up the tripod, so excuse the blurry picture, but the moon was really beautiful with the clouds rolling by.

Gil's finger-cramping texting finally paid off, and some of his drama friends stopped by for a little while.

I love this pic, it looks like a tribal dance around the fire.

And that was our Fourth of July, WHEW!!!

I may actually be developing some enthusiasm for our family reunion campout this year. Go tents! Maybe our t-shirts could say, "Back to camping! Reunion 2008" with a tent logo, or something.

Ha, Ha!!

2009-07-05T22:32:00.000-06:00

I just have to giggle at these pictures of Emma playing with her brother's trains. He's always complaining she won't leave his stuff alone, and dragging her away from his train creations. But in a moment of inattentiveness on his part, she had fun doing something forbidden.

1 Jul - Connor's train bridge creation from the coffee table to the couch.

7 Feb - Almost 8 months old. I never blogged this, but always meant to. Even here, she knows she's getting away with murder.

Summertime Togetherness

2009-07-05T22:17:00.001-06:00

Totally random, but I had this "brilliant" idea of getting all of us out of the house on a late summer evening this past week, Tuesday June 30th. Everyone seems to just slug around at night this summer (all day, too, for that matter), and I thought we could get out, and enjoy the season at one of the elementary school playgrounds. But it was like pulling teeth for the older two. "Are we done yet?" seemed to be the sentiment, and all they did was bicker. I finally gave up on the family togetherness and we headed home to happily pursue our own entertainment. But Connor and Emma had a little fun, anyway.

Connor loves hiding from the camera these days. Gil - Dude, can we get outta here?

Peekaboo!

Just a brief moment laughing at the baby, but this is not an entirely truthful picture. Gil and Dani spent most of the time bickering.

Emma is still in the stage where she eats everything.

Playground gravel sure has an interesting texture.

And fun was had by all. Not.

Gil's Passion for Theater

2009-07-05T19:41:00.007-06:00

It's deja vu. One of my kids is really into the theater, just like I was in high school, but this time around, it's not a girl, it's my Big Kid Gil! Ooops, I mean, big strapping teenage son. He listens to musicals all the time, is taking acting and singing lessons, and hangs out with all his high school and college drama friends whenever he can. His favorite song right now is "Seasons of Love" from the Broadway musical "Rent." Thus, the tagline "525,600 minutes" on all his cell text messages.

I can't really pinpoint when the interest really started for him. I'm guessing it began in junior high, with all the choir performances. But it really took off this school year with his participation in Brigadoon at the high school, and he's been involved in every drama thing he can ever since. Every summer, the Western Wyoming Community College drama department puts on a play/musical for all the kids in the community to participate in, including Rock Springs, Green River, and probably anybody else in the county. This summer it was Seussical Jr. While Gil didn't have a big part, he had a blast participating. I drove him back and forth to the college every day for three weeks, until we finally got to see the big show. Now he's got us all hooked on the music.

It wasn't until I read the program later, that I realized I wasn't supposed to take pictures during the performance. But, I'm glad I didn't know, or I wouldn't have any pics of Gil or the great costumes and sets!

What was really fantastic were the sets and costumes. I was amazed at how much they accomplished with probably not-a-very-big-budget and all those kids! And the performances were really good, too.

Gil, who was a "Who" dad, no lines, but he got into it, nonetheless.

One of the undersea fantasy scenes, my favorite part of the musical in terms of costuming and sets, Gil is on the far left.

I was amazed when they brought out the "whale," really fantastic, and I loved all the sparkly, beautiful, fish on sticks. I wish I had a good pic of the jellyfish, fantastic!

More great sets, Horton the Elephant sitting on his egg, and Amazing Mazy.

Horton, his hatched elephant bird, and Gertrude McFuzz.

Gil got to have a few seconds of the spotlight in the grand finale. He did a breakdance move. Go Gil!

Cast party after the last performance on 25 June. They still had their stage makeup on (Gil said - "We're not queer, I swear!") Gil, his best friend Ty in the center, and one of the drama kids from high school.

Right now, he's attending rehearsal for the current college play, and they are letting him learn how to operate the sound board. I think he's really found his "niche."

Noah's Ark, Paging Noah's Ark

2009-06-26T21:58:00.001-06:00

Boy, that Wyoming weather just let loose tonight. All of a sudden, I could hear rain pelting the front door. The front door is set back three feet under an overhang. Not only was it raining hard, but that Wyoming wind was blowing it sideways!
Dani is the fun, impulsive one in our family, very giggly, and she couldn't resist running out into the storm.

Monkey see, monkey do, and Connor joined her. They were only out there about 10 seconds and got soaking wet!

It all blew over in about 30 to 45 minutes, and then Dani took this beautiful picture of our Wyoming sunset.

P.S. It's official - we will be there for the campout in August! Zen's family reunion is the week before, so I'll be able to bring myself and all my heathens for the Cox reunion. I'm not sure if Zen will be able to make it, but I'll be there with my tent, and lots of valium (it's a joke.)

Cake In Your Face!!

2009-06-23T23:38:00.000-06:00

Here's our little party we had for Emma on Sunday. Super simple, but still fun:

It's the quickest, easiest idea I could come up with (sorry, can't stand store-bought cakes with the 99% grease icing), and they were pretty yummy.

Singing happy birthday.

Look, we're messy, too!!

Dani was being so silly, wanting to have a messy face just like Emma. Emma also had fun gnawing on the wax candle. Mmmm, reminds me of crayons...

Grammie (my Mom) sent some cute outfits for Emma. We're so lame, we forgot to buy anything for Emma, except cake.

But Emma's favorite present was the musical card Grammie sent. Deega has been wandering around the house for several days, listening to "Winnie-the-Pooh" music and dancing, while I sing along with the card for her. I'll have to post some pics of that. The card is pretty mangled, but still playing music.

Happy Father's Day

2009-06-21T23:59:00.001-06:00

Good Father's Day this year, but then I'm not Zen, so maybe I can get him to sum up his Father's Day in the comments (hint, hint).

We also finally had Foofie's birthday-cake-in-your-face little family party, but I'll blog that one tomorrow, 'cause it's already past midnight.

My Mom sent Zen this really cool book about American Special Forces soldiers on horseback in Afghanistan. I think he really liked it. I also got Zen the "Pursuit of Happyness" movie with Will Smith, a great movie about fathers and never giving up.

Dani's card (see below).

Now, you know I'm all about the funny cards, and I found so many good ones this year, Zen got 4 cards, one from each of his kids:

I dig the sound cards these days. Some of them are really funny. When you open this Darth Vader card, you get the infamous breathing, with him saying, "I AM YOUR FATHER!!!" Put it all together, and it makes this card hilarious!

Mom also sent Zen a funny Simpson's card, but Connor carried it off somewhere. I'll scan it and post it tomorrow if I can find it.

I also talked to my Dad on the phone, and afterwards, I found myself wishing I had the dough to take him and Kathy for a trip to see his Mom. Now that he is on oxygen and his legs are in constant pain, his mobility is even more limited, but a junkload of dough would go a long way towards getting him down to Bullhead City. It would take some special travel arrangements to make that happen. But, at the very least, I should call him more often.

Sorry, not anything deep to say on Father's Day, except I just feel gratitude for the men in my life. I'm thankful for my hard-working husband, my great father-in-law, and for the great memories my own father gave to me growing up.

One Year Old!

2009-06-18T23:59:00.001-06:00

Emma Foofie-Loo Bunny Deega Diggs
Happy Birthday!

One Year Old

This is my favorite place to take pictures at my house - right by the wood fence in the front yard. It has been so rainy lately, so we were lucky to get a few pics done yesterday on her birthday. We're waiting to do the actual b-day party with the traditional cake-in-your-face when Zen can be here. He should be in from the field Friday or Saturday.

"Don't mess with a girl's binky."

Eleven Months Old

Ten Months Old

Nine Months Old

Eight Months Old

Seven Months Old

Six Months Old

Five Months Old

Four Months Old

Three Months Old

Two Months Old

One Month Old

Born one year ago!

Learning to Go Down the Stairs

2009-06-16T23:50:00.000-06:00

We've been trying to get Emma to go down the stairs for a long time now, and today she was finally willing to do it herself, just in time to be one year old tomorrow!

Midway, attempting the 2nd half.

The Little "Baby" That Could.

All the way to the bottom. Success!!

Boneless

2009-06-16T23:45:00.003-06:00

Babies and toddlers can pick the weirdest places to just drop down and sleep. Here are a few pics I missed with my recent blogging laziness.

Emma fell asleep on the coffee table, of all places.

Cutie Patootie. 8 June 09

Scottish Festival 12-13 June '09

2009-06-16T22:37:00.001-06:00

There should be something for everyone here - 20+ pics!!! Enjoy!

Friday night at the Tatoo, drum majors tossing their sticks/batons high.

No wonder he collected some phone #'s, what a good-lookin' kid!

Foofie-Loo happy to be out of the car and walking everywhere!

Connor and Dani dancing at the tatoo. Zen and I took the babies home early when it started to rain, but Dani and Gil stayed with Grammie to listen to the Wicked Tinkers.

Liz and Zen, Saturday at noon for the welcome/clan presentations.

Love those bagpipes and Scottish kilts!

The drum majors and bagpipe bands. The announcer made a joke about the "littlest drum major", the small boy you see here.

Our clan, the MacGregor's, "Royal Is My Race".

The kids decided to walk with Grammie in the clan parade.

Dani and Connor, but I don't think he was ready to wait so long for his turn to march.

Daddy has such good, big shoulders.

Emma out in the grass by the MacGregor clan tent.

Connnor had a blast running around the tent, playing "catch me if you can" with me, the family paparazzi.

My pretty Dani.

Katy, Liz, and Avy. Good to see the kilt!

Sedona, snacking on Grammie's provisions. Thanks for the snacks, they were a lifesaver, no to mention a pocketbook saver!

Hey, Chris, thanks for cheesin' it up for the camera! And good to see your Dad, too.

Avy, happy to show off her treasures from the Scottish Festival vendors.

Thanks for the seefood Connor. NOT.

Dude, traveling with Emma is just torture. She screeches her head off almost non-stop, wanting to get out of her seat. So, even though it was only 25-30 min. from home, we couldn't take it anymore, and we stopped at Little America for a break.

They had a nice playground there.

Emma was happy to move around, and taste wood chips. Uhghh.

Hope to be at the Scottish Festival next year! We'll see what loot Mom and Jane pick up in Scotland this summer!

It's Pretty Much About The Swords

2009-06-13T23:16:00.000-06:00

Don't die of shock, or anything, but I'm blogging tonight. I'm going to split my Scottish Festival post into two posts, one now about swords, and one tomorrow night about the festival, 'cause I am not staying up past midnight blogging.

We went to the Salt Lake City Scottish festival this weekend in American Fork/Lehi Utah. I took a zillion photos, mostly of the kids enjoying themselves. Gil had the most fun, I think. He got a real sword, a blue beverage bottle he wanted for a keepsake, and two phone #'s of chicks he met at the Tattoo last night, and on the drive back to Grammie's house, he spent the whole time texting them. Teenagers in the modern era. "I'm a play-ah," he said. Sigh...

But he was really into the festival. Grammie may have a convert. On the way home, I asked Gil if he would be willing to wear a kilt next year. "Yeah, that would be awesome!!!" We'll have to start saving our pennies for an authentic McGregor tartan kilt or two.

This year we splurged and bought all the kids wood swords, and got a nice metal sword for Gil. Dani also saw these cool celtic leather and bead hair braiding do-dads, but I talked her into letting me buys supplies so we could make a lot more of them for the same price the vendor was charging at the festival. More pics after we get the supplies.

Gil and Connor at the fesival, outside the McGregor tent.

Gil and Dani.

We made it home. Hail the conquering heros!

This is a classic Connor expression.

Attack!

Sassy-Loo-Hoo.

Wanna make bets on how long it takes for one of the wood swords to break?

How about how long it takes Gil to do something stupid with his metal sword, and I have to confiscate it?

Memorial Day Weekend

2009-06-05T23:41:00.001-06:00

I have heard your pleas, so I am back to blogging! I was away, sheerly for lazy reasons, but I'll try to do better.

Over Memorial Day weekend, we spent Sunday with Sue and her family, for Mackay's blessing. Check out Sue's blog for the story on that. Then, after eating lunch at Brian Nate's Mom and Dad's house (I really enjoyed meeting his mother, a very gracious lady), we went further up the western border of Wyoming, to spend some time with Zen's family. Zen's sister, Jan, and her daughter, Katie, as well as Katie's friend, were there as well. Monday, everyone, except me and the two little ones (Emma was sick, so I kept her at the house), did the traditional Memorial Day activity of visiting all the Allred gravesites around Star Valley. I don't have much detail on that, because I was not there this time. But in times past, there have been volunteers from a local military organization of retired military men who play taps (?) and then shoot off guns in a ceremonial honoring of the fallen dead. After everyone came home from the VF potluck luncheon, we hung out in the backyard for a while before we headed back home.

Emma crashed for a nap at the top of Grandma's stairs.

Grandpa had purchased one of those fun little remote control helicopters, and Connor had a blast playing with it. It was hard for him to leave it with Grandpa at the end of the day. (Look right above Zen's hand, below the painting. It's the Mosquito!)

I love this old cart that sits out in the backyard behind the farm house. It had warmed up considerably by the afternoon, and so I took Emma outside, despite her cold.

Dani and Gil love to go four-wheelin' at Grandma and Grandpa's farm. Connor loved going for rides, too. Gil tried out the motorcycle, but it was tough learning, and maybe he'll give it another shot next time.

Sassy-Loo-Hoo in her four-wheelin' "pinup".

Costume Snafu

2009-05-28T23:59:00.001-06:00

I pulled another all-nighter last night, sewing a medieval costume for Dani for the medieval fair at her school today. When Dani told me last week that she needed a costume, I was kind of cranky with her teacher, wondering why he required costumes for them. Sewing is obviously beyond most of their capabilities, and acquiring one that would satisfy Dani is kind of expensive. After looking online, the cheapest thing I found was going to cost me $45 by the time shipping was added, and I wasn't sure it would be big enough, or even get here on time. So, I bit the bullet, spent $25 on fabric and supplies, and set to work sewing a costume myself. Yesterday, I started from scratch, drafting my own pattern, and looking on the internet at pictures of medieval costumes. I carefully made the underdress, to be durable and nicely finished, because it's the kind of thing that could be adapted for future uses, and because of its one-size-fits-all construction, it even fits me. But at the end, I was slopping the overdress together, frantically trying to get it done. I delivered Dani to school 20 minutes late this morning. Whew!

>The aftermath in my dining room: after sewing all night, it was worse than it looks, believe me.

This is what I was going for with the underdress:
Classic Chemise from tudordressing.com There's a lot of good stuff there.
Kind of what I was going for with an overdress. What I wound up making was sloppy, but it was done, you know?

But, once I was done, I had no chance to take a picture with the rush this morning. So, tonight before bed, I asked Dani to put it on, so I could take a picture of it for my blog. What does she tell me? "Oh, I cut off the sleeves because they were too long and puffy and when I pushed up the sleeves, the elastic was uncomfortable." WHAT???!!!!! I spent HOURS making that thing, and it was awesome!! I figured at least the underdress/chemise would be around for a long time, not casually destroyed in one day's usage!! It should have had years of use left in it. After lecturing her for ten minutes, I told her to put the costume back on, so I could take a pic for my blog. It's the least she could do, I said.

I asked her if this was the face she wanted to make for my blog post, and she pouted and refused to talk to me. Sigh...

Cost for online costume - $45. Not having to sew for 12 hours or deal with pouty daughter - Priceless.

See, this is why I don't sew clothes anymore. Hours and hours of effort for something that's difficult to make turn out right. Cardmaking, however, I need to stick with that. 15 minutes can produce something beautiful. And you can make a project for pennies in supplies. Although, sometimes I think I should just give up crafting of ANY VARIETY all together, and just read books from the library for the rest of my life. Heaven knows, it would certainly be cheaper.

When You Get Bored in the Car

2009-05-25T23:05:00.000-06:00

See, this is what happens when you get bored in the car, with kids who are starting to go stir crazy, you take pictures:

Gil, propping up Connor's head by sharing his pillow. What a good big brother.

Dani, taking just the right angle.

My slight obsession with cute baby feet, although they're kind of grungy from playing out in the grass at Grandma and Grandpa's house in Star Valley.

More pics and stories tomorrow. Lots of catch up. See ya!

Little Miracles

2009-05-20T23:38:00.002-06:00

I think today was one of those tiny little miracles that happen sometimes. Easy to overlook, but there nonetheless.

See, I woke up this morning, got up, and just knew that I had ZERO motivation. Like, I could just go back to bed, or laze about, THINK about being useful, but in the end get nothing done. I got up with Foofie, got her a bottle, put on my exercise clothes (just in case I actually got up the motivation to exercise), etc., and promptly sat down to watch tv with her. We played Moochie (this is how she gets fed a lot these days - eating off someone's plate, baby food has gone out the window), eating some awesome wheat bread I made yesterday (at least yesterday was productive). I thought, "There is almost no chance something constructive is going to get done." By about noon, my self-fulfilled prophecy had come true. Still in my sweats.

But then Zen came home for lunch, and I puttered around, not wanting to look like a total heathen. I sat at my computer downstairs, just messing around. That led to, "Well, I'm sitting here next to the laundry room. I might as well put in an easy load of clothes." Thus started three or four loads of "easy" laundry, the kind you don't have to check very hard for stains - towels and jeans. Then, Gil called, wanting to come home because he felt sick. I thought I could hurry and pick him up and get back before Zen had to go back to work. About 20 seconds later my visiting teachers showed up (I forgot they were coming), and I had a little dilemma. See, Foofie was asleep in her bed, and I didn't want to wake her up in the middle of her nap to go get Gil. I looked at Zen, who was heading back to work, kind of in the air about what to do. Could I send Zen to get Gil, would I have to wake up Foofie and put her and Connor in the car? My VT's handed me a plate of spice cake slices with cream cheese frosting (dude, it was so yummy, must get a recipe), and said they would catch up with me later. In the end, Zen went and got Gil, but I missed my visit with my VT's. Would it be weird if I called them tomorrow and asked them to come back? If it didn't sound so needy, I'd ask them to come once a week. I really enjoy my visits with them. Must be something about adult conversation with women that just fills a void nothing else can.

Okay, so after all that drama, I went back to my computer, and I thought, "Man, I just know there are some bills due. I better go to the upstairs computer and check." Well, one thing led to another, and I balanced the checkbook, paid the bills, and got the medical bills caught up.

Then, I thought, "I could probably exercise. It's only 30 minutes. Yeah, I can do that." So, I did it, even though it took an hour to clock 30 minutes on my machine, with all the interruptions from the kids. Then, I showered, dressed, and put some clean clothes away. I took Gil to play dress rehearsal, mailed a bill, and shopped at Wal-Mart for dinner. After dinner and getting the kids in bed, I fixed the broken headphone jack on Zen's Palm Pilot, attempting soldering electrical components for the first time. The sound doesn't play out of the small speaker in the back, so I messed up something, but at least now you can hear sound through a set of headphones. So, it was a small success. Then on to a blog post before bed.

OH MY HECK. I was USEFUL today! How did that happen? 'Cause when I woke up this morning, I was completely in the "watch soap operas and eat chocolate bon bons" frame of mind.

I'm going to count today as a small miracle. Somebody must have been nudging me just a little, so I didn't have a stroke from not-accomplishing-anything.